In the Sun
by NajwaBarlaam
Summary: He watched her swallow and inhale slowly. "I think we should work on being friends," she said. James closed his eyes for a moment, before nodding with his forehead still against hers. "Just out of curiosity, do you usually kiss your friends like that?"
1. She Likes to Cage Elephants?

Lily loved, absolutely loved, the Hogwarts express. It reminded her of the way she felt about airports when she was younger. It was just that indescribable feeling of _going_ somewhere. Floo and apparating were certainly faster, but they couldn't match the excitement of airports and the train.

The only downside to the train was that she knew, inevitably, she would run into Potter. In fact, it was more a matter of being completely unable to avoid Potter, as she always tried her best to do so, and always – somehow – ended up stuck in a compartment with him and his friends. She blamed this entirely on her friends, who seemed much more willing to tolerate the prats than she was.

At the moment, Lily was seated next to Marlene McKinnon, her absolute best friend in the world. Next to Marlene was Sirius Black. He had his arm slung around Marlene's shoulder, but that was nothing new. Lily didn't think she'd seen Black sit next to any even moderately attractive female without trying for a least a little physical contact. Herself excluded, of course. Potter's supposed "claim" was thoroughly respected by all of his friends.

The boy in question sat across from his best mate, obviously debating whether he should continue trying to apologize to Lily for having made head boy. They both knew he didn't deserve it, but what was done was done. He was, as always, surrounded by friends. Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew sat on either side of him. Lily would have felt sorry for Dorcas Meadowes for being stuck that close to Potter and Pettigrew, but at least she had the luck to end up next to Remus. He was the only decent one of the lot, as far as Lil was concerned.

"I've been thinking about it, Lily," Sirius said, looking around from the other side of Marlene as he spoke, "and I really don't think you have the right to be angry with James for being head boy. Honestly, at least he isn't prejudiced." He paused for a moment. "Which," he smirked, "is more than can be said for you."

Lily shared an eye roll with Mary MacDonald, who sat on her other side, as Marlene elbowed Black and extricated herself from his grasp. "And I suppose I'm a closet self-hater then, is that it, Black? I have," she added in her haughtiest tone, "been seriously considering joining Voldemort." Lily ignored Mary's gasp, continuing in a dry voice. "If I really apply myself, one day he may consider me worthy to lick his boots."

Dorcas and Marlene both snorted with laughter, but James cut across them. "You really shouldn't joke about him, Lily," he said, sincerity pouring out of his eyes. "You're actually in a great deal of danger."

Lily glanced up at the ceiling, seeming to pray for patience. "Yes, Potter, I'm aware of what a Voldermort regime would mean for muggleborns, which is why Black's suggestion that I'm prejudiced is completely ludicrous."

Black smirked. "You misunderstood me. I didn't mean you were prejudiced against muggleborns, I meant you were prejudiced against purebloods." Even Mary laughed at this.

"You're right, Black," Marlene jumped in. "I can't even begin to imagine the trials and tribulations you and Potter have faced. Mountains of galleons in your Gringott's vaults, loads of connections to help you get a job when you finish school, not to mention being top of the class without even having to try," finished Marlene, elbowing him again for good measure.

"And honestly, even if you weren't handed everything on a silver platter, I don't see how you can claim I'm prejudiced," said Lily. "I like loads of purebloods," she gestured to Dorcas and Remus. "They just don't happen to be you."

Black smiled, shaking his head and tisking. "You might stoop to being friends with purebloods, but you refuse to date anyone who is not a muggleborn."

Lily scoffed, swinging her head around to look at Potter. "Please. This is your new ploy? Trying to make me out to be prejudiced for not dating you?" She shook her head and leaned over to glare at Black. "My complete unwillingness to date Potter has nothing to do with his blood status and everything to do with the fact that he's an arrogant prat that thinks the world and everyone in it should bend to his every whim just because he's good a quidditch." Out of the corned of her eye, Lily say Potter wince, but refused to feel guilty for speaking the truth.

"Lily, we all know you're a shrew, there's not need to prove it," Black responded cheerfully.

"Oi, mate," Potter cut in, shaking his head at Black, "can we not?"

Black shrugged, smiling. "Real arrogant prat, yeah? Defending you when you've just insulted him for no reason." Before either Lily or Potter could respond, Black continued, "But I didn't say you wouldn't date James, I said you wouldn't date purebloods. And I'm right. When have you ever dated a pureblood? I can name _several_ muggleborns, but not a single pureblood."

"And if you think I don't know every bloke you've even so much as looked at," Black added, before she could object, "you clearly have no idea what it's like living with this one," he jerked his head toward Potter. Black flung himself back on the seat, laying a hand across his head in faux desperation. "She smiled at Fenwick today," he said, in a fair imitation of Potter at his most dejected. "She likes him, I know she likes him. But why," Black's voice rose to a pathetic whine at the word, "does she like him."

Lily glanced at Potter, who was trying – and failing – to cover his blush by using both hands to mess up his hair. She quickly turned her eyes back to Black. "I still don't see what me turning down Potter has to do with him being a pureblood."

Black cocked his head at her. "Can you think of a single pureblood you've even thought about dating?" he asked. "Honestly?" When she looked blank, he smiled triumphantly. "See. Prejudiced," he said in a sing song voice.

Lily considered for a moment. "I suppose you have a point," she said fairly, to the obvious shock of everyone in the carriage. "But I don't think it has so much to do with a prejudice against purebloods, as, I dunno, having more in common with muggleborns."

Black raised an eyebrow. "And if I were to announce that I didn't have anything against muggleborns, I just had more in common with purebloods, and so I was only going to date purebloods, wouldn't you think I was a bit of an arse."

Lily pondered the question, clearly taking it seriously. "I think it's different. No really," she continued, over Black's snort, "I've spent the last seven years living in the wizarding world. I know about the sports, and the music, and the culture and all that. Mary and I could both talk about almost anything Marlene and Dorcas could talk about." She shook her head, keeping eye contact with Black. "But the reverse isn't exactly true, is it? I mean, a pureblood isn't going to know who Jack Johnson or David Beckham is. If I say Cage the Elephant puts me in a good mood, or A Fine Frenzy is soothing, or that I feel like dancing at Wicked, or hunkering down to read Pride and Prejudice, or that I sometimes wish we could make a DVD player work here, because I'm in the mood for an Office marathon, none of that makes any sense to you." She tilted her head, continuing her thought process. "A muggleborn might not know exactly who A Fine Frenzy is, but if I said it's the sort of music you'd hear on Grey's Anatomy, they'd have a good idea. They might not know who Robben is, but if I said he's a bloody fantastic ball handler, they'd catch on without me having to first explain what football is, and why he's so amazing to watch." She shook her head again. "It's not that I'm prejudiced against purebloods, it's just that being a witch is only part of what I am, and I'm not really very interested in being with someone who only wants part of me."

No one seemed to know what to say to this, so Lily shrugged, and smiled, and announced that she needed to go patrol.

As she walked out the door, James turned to Mary. "I don't even have half a chance with her, do I?" he said, his voice distraught. "I didn't understand anything she just said. She likes to cage _elephants_?" he asked, baffled. "Is that some mad muggle sport?"

Everyone's eyes shifted to Mary, who had fallen to the floor, she was laughing so hard. "Not cage elephants," she gasped, still laughing, "Cage _the_ Elephant." When no one understood, she tried to get herself under better control. "It's a band." She shook her head. "Honestly, James, I'm not sure you had a chance from the first train ride," she responded sympathetically to his earlier question. "Even if you learned to play the guitar, I don't think it would make a difference."

"Oi. Fenwick," James shouted. "I'd like a word." Benjy Fenwick, a tall sixth year, stopped on his way to join the other Gryffindor for the sorting and turned to look at James in surprise. "You play the guitar, yeah?" When Fenwick nodded, James continued, "I'd like some lessons."

Fenwick's eyebrows rose. "You want lessons? In how to play the guitar?" He looked confused. "James, I really don't understand how a guitar could figure into any prank you guys might be planning."

James shook his head. "It's not for a prank. I just have an interest." He glared at the sixth year. "And this is between us, yeah?" he added menacingly. "Don't go running your mouth about it to anyone, hear?"

Fenwick agreed calmly, still blatantly confused. He didn't look any less baffled when James nodded sharply and strode away, heading toward the Gryffindor table to watch the sorting. After a moment, Fenwick shrugged and followed, seating himself at the other end with a group of lads in his year.

When James got to the table, Remus eyed him curiously, but said nothing. Sirius, ever the subtle one, loudly inquired as to what the conversation with the sixth year was all about. James shrugged uncomfortably, glancing at Lily, who was – mercifully – distracted by her friends, and muttered something about 'just having a word'.

As the first years were sorted, James cheered loudly for each Gryffindor. Then he proceeded to eat heartily with his friends. After desert was finished, he rose with the rest of his mates, ready to head up to the dorms, only to find Lily waiting for him. He stared at her blankly for several long moments.

"Hi?" he ventured.

She took a deep breath and, with the air of getting the worst over with, rushed through her sentence so fast he didn't catch a word of it.

"One more time?" James asked, hoping she wouldn't shout at him for listening poorly.

"We have separate quarters," she said, with obvious distaste. "Because we're the Heads." When he didn't respond, she elaborated. "There's a heads tower, with a common room, a bathroom, and two bedrooms. We're supposed to sleep there, instead of the old dormitories."

James tried to speak, but his mouth just opened and closed, no sound coming out. Sirius slapped him on the back, loudly congratulating him on his luck.

James thought he should test his understanding of the situation, to be sure he'd heard Lily right. "We're sleeping together?" His voice cracked at the end, and he turned an interesting shade of scarlet.

"Merlin," Sirius sighed. "It's a wonder he's ever managed to snog anyone. Ever." He shook his head, disappointed.

James' eyes snapped to Sirius, back to Lily, and then settled about six inches above her left shoulder. "Right then," he said in an abnormally deep voice, "I suppose we should go now."

Sirius snickered and led the others away, proclaiming at full volume that they really should leave the lovebirds to christen their new nest.

James risked a glance at Lily, who looked like she might actually consider sharing living quarters with him a fate worse than death, and fell into step beside her as she led him to their new rooms.

"So, how did you find out where to go?" he asked, relieved to find that his voice was back to its normal baritone. He prayed like hell it didn't crack again.

"Oh," Lily shrugged, "I was pretty close with the head girl last year."

"Right," James nodded. He racked his brain for a suitable topic of conversation.

"How was your summ –" Lily started to say.

At the same time, James began to ask, "What classes are you – " He cut himself short when he realized she had spoken as well.

Lily switched to answering his unfinished question, "Potions –"

And James tried to save the situation by answering hers, "Good, I just . . . "

They both decided to wait for the other one to speak, which led, naturally, to them walking in silence for a solid minute.

"I" – James started.

"Right, so, we're here." Lily wasn't going to stop for anything this time. "We need to choose a password together," Lily said, gesturing to the portrait of a group of laughing students from what appeared to be the seventeenth century.

"Anything you like is fine with me," James shrugged.

"OK," Lily thought for a moment, "Polyjuice Potion." She nodded, ready to walk in.

"Except that," James shook his head apologetically when Lily turned to glare at him. "It's just that they'll guess it."

"Who will guess it?" she asked sharply.

James shrugged again, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "The lads. They'll definitely get that one. Probably no more than a day. They'll go for anything to do with you first. So, you know, potions, charms, anything muggle related, beauty products, all that lot should really be tossed out."

"Right," Lily said, taking a deep breath. "Why don't you choose something then," she suggested, making it clear it was not really a question.

"Well," he said, scuffing the floor with the toe of his shoe, "the thing is, they know me really well, so I don't really think that's the best plan either."

Lily huffed out a breath. "Let me see if I understand. We need to choose a password, but it can't be anything to do with me, or your friends will guess it. And it can't be anything to do with you, or your friends will guess it."

James smile brightly. "Exactly," he nodded.

Lily looked at the portrait for long moment. "Right," she said, straightening her back. "Bloody buggering, son of a whore, arse wank." She glanced back at James, whose mouth had dropped open. Looking back at the portrait, she asked "Got that?" The students in the portrait were doubled up laughing, but managed to nod anyway, and the painting swung open. Lily stepped through without a second look at James.

* * *

_Fair warning: This is going to be a bit A/U. The characters are all generally in line with what could be inferred from the books, but I've set it in current times. I figure if it's a choice between doing a shitty job of trying to write about the 1970's (with no legitimate knowledge of the era) and changing the time the story is set in, I'll take the latter. I could be wrong, but I only remember a few explicit references to dates in the book (like James and Lily's gravestones) and don't find them particularly central to the story. On the other hand, as this fanfic is intended to be about Lily being split between two worlds, it's important to me that I do my best to accurately represent the muggle interests she might have. Short of putting a mass amount of research into an era I really have no interest in, I have no real way to do that if I set it in the 1970's. As such, I chose what I consider the lesser of two evils. If that's a problem for you, please feel free to hit the back button now._

-Naj


	2. They're Not Dirty, No

A week had gone by and James and Benjy Fenwick were in the heads common room, having the first guitar lesson. Lily was away at a gathering for the Slug Club, so James figured this was the best location for the clandestine meeting. He didn't want Lily to know about it yet, and he definitely didn't want the rest of the school's population to know.

Getting people into the common room without them hearing the password had proven quite difficult. He'd ended up just giving Fenwick instructions on how to get to the portrait, and then opening it for him when he knocked. He was a lot less trouble than Sirius and the lads, if still baffled.

He glanced over at Fenwick. They'd always gotten along quite well, but James couldn't bring himself to exactly _like_ any bloke Lily seemed so fond of.

Fenwick was holding out the guitar to James, explaining how to grip it. As James settled in, he looked up in surprise when the other boy asked a question.

"So, is this about Lily then?" Fenwick inquired.

James glared at him. "What makes you think that?"

"Well," Fenwick started carefully, "she likes music – especially acoustic stuff – and I honestly can't think of any other reason you'd be after taking lessons."

"Listen, if you aren't wanting to help, I'm sure I can find – " James started.

Fenwick shook his head. "No, I'm happy to help," he said, smiling. "I was just curious." When James continued to look irritated with him, Fenwick scrubbed a hand through his hair. "Listen, there's nothing like that between me and Lily. We're just friends. Really. I'm pulling for you. She's a great girl, and you're obviously serious about her if you're willing to go to these lengths," he said, indicating the guitar. When James look slightly mollified, he smiled brightly. "Right, well, let's get started on the first cord."

After an hour or so, James could successfully play a song. He was actually quite pleased. He thought it would take more than one lesson to master.

Fenwick glanced down at his watch. "Well, I should probably be getting back to the common room. That was good though. You did well. Most people don't pick it up this easily."

James smiled and clapped him on the shoulder. "I had a good teacher."

Fenwick nodded, looking surprised. "Anyway, let me know when you'd like to meet again. As long as it doesn't interfere with charms club, I'll try to work it into my schedule."

James nodded dismissively, and Fenwick headed out through the portrait.

When Lily got back a short while later, James was still fiddling with the guitar he had transfigured to match Fenwick's. She looked surprised to see the instrument in his hands.

"You play the guitar?" she asked.

James shrugged. "A bit," he answered nonchalantly.

"Really?" she pressed, suspicion clear in her voice. "Let's hear some then."

James looked a little taken aback, but quickly settled. He shrugged again, and started playing. He decided to go for the gusto and sing the words Fenwick had told him went along with the music.

_Frère Jacques, frère Jacques,  
Dormez-vous? __Dormez-vous?  
Sonnez les matines! __Sonnez les matines!  
Din, dan, don. Din, dan, don._

As he was singing, James got the sinking feeling that he'd made a huge mistake. Lily looked distinctly like she was trying very hard not to laugh. He finished the song anyway, and then stared at the ground, waiting for the inevitable shoe to drop.

Lily cleared her throat. "That was . . ." she trailed off, not entirely sure what it exactly it _had_ been.

"I'm missing something, aren't I? Were the lyrics dirty or something? Only, Fenwick just taught me this tonight, and I didn't think to ask, since he didn't seem like the type to try something like that –" he broke off when Lily snorted out a laugh. She tried valiantly to turn it into a cough, but failed.

"They're not dirty, no," she shook her head, grinning widely.

"What, then?" James asked, not sure he really wanted to know the answer.

"Well," said Lily, trying to decide how best to explain. "It's just that it's sort of children's song. You know, the sort you might learn in nursery school."

James' eyes widened, and he actually managed to blush more than he had been, which was quite an achievement.

"Right, then," he nodded, "Fenwick dies tomorrow." He rose from his chair and started toward his room.

"James, wait," Lily grabbed his arm, laughing softly, "I don't think he was trying to make a prat of you." When James raised his eyebrows, she shook her head, still grinning. "It _is_ the type of song you'd start with when you were first learning an instrument. I can't imagine he realized you'd try to, you know, _serenade_ me with it."

James pulled away. "I wasn't trying to 'serenade'you with it. You asked me to play, so I did."

Lily laughed again. "We both know you wanted me to ask. I'll bet it's never taken you more than a few hours to learn anything, and you probably thought, 'well, this is easy,' And wondered what all the fuss was about."

"He said I did well!" James shouted. "What else was I supposed to think?"

Lily shook her head. "I dunno," she said, rolling her eye up to the ceiling, "maybe that you did well for you _first_ lesson." She smiled at him. "Thank you for the song, though. Really, it was far more entertaining than the Slug Club tonight." And with that, she wished him goodnight and headed off to bed.

The next morning at breakfast, James found Fenwick first thing. "Oi, Fenwick. What are you playing at? You didn't tell me that was a nursery song" he said with disgust.

Fenwick's eyebrows shot up so high they hid under his hair. "Oh, no, James. Tell me you didn't play it for her."

James glared, but refused to answer. He tossed himself into his seat, daring McKinnon, who happened to be up early, to say a word.

McKinnon, always up for a dare, turned to Fenwick. "Played what?" she asked. She had already surmised that the who referred to Lily.

"_Frère Jacques," _James responded, banging his head against the table. "He didn't tell me it was a bloody children's song."

As McKinnon dissolved into laughter, Fenwick turned to James. "Right, well, is that it for the lessons then?" he asked.

James shook his head. "I'd like to keep going, if you don't mind. I know it won't do any good, but if it's something she likes," he shrugged, "I might as well try, right? I haven't really got any other options anyway, have I?"

Even McKinnon looked sympathetic at this. "Well," she said, selecting an apple, "you could always try football, yeah?" She looked undecided for a moment, but eventually chose to continue. "I know she dated a footballer last summer, and she's always been quite keen on the sport." She shook her head. "I have absolutely no idea why. They almost never score. And you can actually tie. At zero."

Pleasantly surprised that James hadn't shown any overt reaction to the idea of Lily's summer boyfriend, Marlene continued, smiling at his incredulous expression. "Yeah, it's not even all that uncommon. When the time is up, if no one has scored, they just call it a draw."

"But then who wins?" James asked, clearly shocked.

Marlene just shrugged. "I guess that's something you could ask Lily. Or, even better, you could find out on your own and dazzle her with your knowledge of her muggle interests." Her tone made it clear that she didn't really think this would help him win Lily over, but James was still heartened by the idea that any of Lily's friends were willing to give him even the mildest sort of encouragement.


	3. Sirius at his Most Helpful

A few weeks later, James came down for dinner in the Great Hall on a Sunday evening. He walked in with Remus at his side, and together they surveyed the table. In first through third year, he and his mates had always sat in the same place. No one even thought about taking the Marauder's seats; everyone feared the inevitable backlash if they so much as considered usurping them. Then, in fourth year, the story changed. Fourth year was when Sirius took a real interest in girls. It was also the point at which James began asking Lily out. The end result was that if Sirius got to the Great Hall first, the Marauders sat next to whatever bird Sirius was after that week. If James arrived ahead of him, they sat as close to Lily as possible.

On this particular day, Sirius was already seated. James couldn't decide if he was pleased at the proximity to Lily. She was close enough that she could reasonably hear and join in the conversation, but it would be impossible for James to situate himself so as to be able to stare at her comfortably. She also wasn't far enough away to prevent what Sirius dubbed "The Lily Effect," whereby James would manage to accidentally choke on his pumpkin juice, or knock his spaghetti into his lap, or trip over his own feet, or any number of other Lily-inspired, embarrassing mishaps.

James took a seat next to Dorcas Meadowes, and thought perhaps with Lily being two people down from him – separated from Dorcas by Marlene – and on the same side of the bench, so he couldn't really see her, that he might actually be able to make it through the meal without completely humiliating himself. He decided it might be best if he just avoided talking altogether. With his new plan in place, James found himself irritated when Sirius addressed him directly.

"How was your match, then, Prongs?" he asked.

James shook his head frantically, trying to indicate to Sirius that this was not a line of questioning to be continued. Unfortunately, Sirius just grinned. He turned to Marlene. He didn't have his arm around her at the moment, but he had managed to sit so that they were practically touching all along the lengths of their legs.

"Went to watch a football match, he did" he jerked his head toward James. "Bloody madness, I say. I absolutely refused to go with him. What do I want with football when I have quidditch? Honestly, they don't even have _brooms."_

James had escalated to making cutting motions across his neck, trying to get Sirius to close his giant mouth. When he saw Lily turn his way in surprise, he froze with his arm awkwardly in the air. When he realized how foolish he looked, he dropped it immediately, accidentally overturning his water glass. As Dorcas evaporated the water, James silently thanked Merlin for his firm rule never to drink anything but water when sitting at the same table as Lily.

"You went to a football match?" she asked, eyebrows raised.

James shrugged. "Sure. You know, I thought I should try to get a feel for muggles and all, what with being in NEWT level muggle studies." He waved his fork casually in the air and somehow, Merlin only _knew_ how, managed to catch it in Dorcas' hair.

By the time he had disentangled it, the others had mostly settled down to quiet snickering. He told himself that his face couldn't possibly be as red as it felt.

"And she wonders why I hex people when she's around. Honestly, it has to make a better impression than this," he murmured under his breath, surprised when he heard Dorcas snort into her soup. She grinned at him, but he thought he had a fifty-fifty chance that she would refrain from mentioning to her friends.

When he risked a look her way, he saw that Lily was still watching him.

"Who did you see?" she asked, smiling encouragement. He thought he had definitely seen that same smile directed at a first year who may or may not have wetted himself the first time he saw Hagrid.

"Arsenal and Liverpool," James answered, making no effort to elaborate.

Lily raised one eyebrow delicately. "I take it you weren't a fan?"

James shrugged, using every ounce of his quidditch skills to prevent any further mishaps. He thought he definitely shouldn't attempt to eat or drink anything else. Or lift any silverware. "It was alright," he answered.

"This is what I mean, mate," Sirius added, at his least helpful. "No brooms, one ball, and no bats at all. What sort of a person likes a sport like that?"

"No, I'm sure," James began, trying to forestall any further commentary by his friend, "that it's a great sport. I just, well, I mean to say . . . it doesn't exactly . . . er, I can't quite . . . "

"Fathom a game that could possibly end with a final score of zero to zero," Marlene finished for him. Sirius nodded sharply at her side, making a sweeping gesture that seem to imply that the matter had been sorted out to his standards and needed no further discussion.

Lily huffed. "You're always on about that. Really, they play with penalties for the last of the World Cup, but it's really unnatural. Football isn't about who takes better penalty shots. And," she continued, as Marlene opened her mouth to respond, "don't give me that 'they should just play until someone wins' bollocks, because that's not a good solution either. They would have to just keep adding thirty minutes of overtime each time a period ended in a draw. And," she still refused the allow Marlene to speak, "they aren't wizards and witches, so you can't expect them to play endlessly." She shook her head. "Anyway, there's nothing wrong with a draw. I don't see why people harp on about that so much."

Sirius considered the matter for a moment. "Well, I think the problem is, if you watch a match that ends with a score of 0-0, you have to really examine yourself afterwards and realize that you've just wasted an entire afternoon where _absolutely nothing_ happened."

Lily shook her head again. "Ugh. I hate that. Yes, if you haven't the brain to actually follow the match, you could see a score of 0-0 at the end and think nothing happened at all, but if you've eyes and ears and even a modicum of intelligence, you'd know that there were probably great saves and near misses and shots on goal that just weren't _quite_ on target."

When Lily shifted her eyes to him, James quickly pretended to be fascinated with the ceiling, which, of course, showed the same scene it had for the past week. He thought he probably shouldn't have been staring at her the way he was, but he'd challenge any bloke breathing to not react when she got all passionate like that. It wasn't as though he didn't have a reason for inciting her wrath the last six years. She looked bloody fantastic when she really cared about something, even if it was yelling at him.

"I take it you agree with Black," she said, not even bothering to make it a question.

James shook his head slowly. "No, not about the draw issue. It's more the penalties that were a problem for me."

"How so?" she asked, and James felt a bit as though a wrong answer might put his head on the block.

"They just seemed a bit, well, random," he replied. "I mean, Arsenal scored a goal, but it didn't count, and I can't fathom why. And that was the _only_ goal. It'd be like if you were the seeker, and you caught the snitch on a zero-all score, and somehow they refused to count it, but without any bloody reason. _And_ they'd managed it with one less player, because the official held up a little red slip of paper after a collision and so, for reasons best known to the complete _prat_ who did it, one of the Arsenal players just walked off the field. Even if the color red is somehow akin to calling your mother a slag, I think I'd clobber any player who just left in the middle of a match. And they didn't even _replace_ him, though they made a substitution later. The just played the rest of the game one man down." James shook his head in disgust.

He heard a strangled noise and turned to see that Mary MacDonald was laughing so hard she had choked on her pumpkin juice. He felt a strange sense of satisfaction that he wasn't the one choking on a drink this time. He turned to Lily victoriously, only to find that she was staring at him as though she'd been clobbered over the head with something heavy.

"You know," Mary was saying, having managed to cough most of the pumpkin juice out of her lungs, "he makes a fair point. I bet most footballers would rather the official call their mother a slag than get a red card."

Lily smiled at Mary in agreement before turning back to James. "Did you go to the match without looking at any of the rules first?"

James shrugged uncomfortably. She made this sound like a grievous mistake.

"A red card is usually only given if a player violently fouls another player," Lily explained.

James scrunched down his eyebrows. "Couldn't you give that at every play? They're constantly kicking each other. And I saw a lot more violent plays where the player actually got the ball away from someone because of it."

Lily nodded in agreement. "If you win ball, most anything goes. Not absolutely anything, mind, but most anything. I think they're after trying to prevent people aiming to hurt the person rather than get the ball. If you end up the ball, obviously that was your goal," she shrugged.

"Right," said James, "so one foul and you're out of the game, and they can't even replace you?"

Lily shook her head. "Only if it's especially violent. A lot of fouls don't even get booked, and if they do, it's just a yellow." At his blank look, she elaborated. "A yellow is a warning."

James nodded slowly. "So what about the goal?"

Lily considered. "I didn't see it, so I can't really know, but my best guess for why they'd disallow a goal is that a player was offsides." She glanced at Mary for confirmation, getting a nod of agreement.

"Everyone was between the lines," James replied, still baffled.

Lily smiled. "Yes, but there have to be two defenders in front of the offensive player. Usually the goal keeper and one other player. Or the ball has to be in front of the offensive player." When he continued to look blank, she demonstrated with the items on the table and a bit of Mary's help. Their friends looked on, bemused.

She smiled. "This," she said to Sirius, "is why I tend to date muggleborns. Everything I like in the muggle world requires loads of explanation, and still never really makes much sense to your average wizard."

Sirius gasped, clearly offended. "I know you did not just call my best mate _average,_" he said, clutching a hand to his chest. "Don't listen to the mad woman, James. She clearly doesn't know what she's saying."

Lily rolled her eyes, but James saw her lips quirk up at the corners. Sirius grinned. "Can you honestly say any other wizard has ever gone to this much trouble just to try to understand the mad muggle things you like?"

Lily chose not to respond, and James wasn't sure if it was because she was embarrassed by his attention or angry that Sirius had called her interests "mad muggle things." She had some color in her cheeks, but that could be just as easily brought on by either emotion.

"Right, well, I've an essay to finish. Enjoy the rest of your meal everyone," Lily said, rising gracefully. James had an almost irresistible urge to clobber Sirius when the idiot gave him a thumbs up and a cheeky grin.

_So, should I keep going? I have a few more chapters already written, but for them to work I have to add one in between this one and the next, and I'm a bit undecided on whether it's worth it or not. _

_Naj_


	4. There's a War On, You Know

The first Hogsmeade weekend of the year came, and James did not ask Lily to go with him. He thought about it, but he'd finally gotten them to a point where she didn't simply alternate between ignoring him and shouting at him. When they had Prefect meetings, they got along well. When they patrolled the corridors, they found topics they were both interested in. Well, mostly James found topics Lily was interested in, but he could have listened to her talk about flobberworms and been perfectly happy.

At the moment, he was sitting in the Three Broomsticks with his mates. They were all sipping on butterbeers when Lily walked through the door with Benjy Fenwick. James glanced away and tried to bring up quidditch, but Padfoot was not to be distracted.

"So," Sirius said evilly, jerking his head toward Fenwick. "What do you think? Do we engorge his head?" When James shook his head, Sirius reconsidered. "Hands? Like to see him play his little guitar with hands the sizes of buckets."

"Padfoot," James sighed.

Sirius nodded in full agreement. "You're right. That was crap. I'm off my game." He contemplated his hands. "And that was weak, even for a first suggestion." He shrugged. "Clearly we need to get you back on the horse. I haven't pulled off a good prank in ages, and I'm quite sure it's because _you_ haven't wanted to pull off a good prank in ages."

Remus glanced at James before turning back to Sirius. "I think he's going for mature this year." When James shrugged, Remus continued. "Don't get down, James. I know it can't be easy that she agreed to go with him, but I really think you're making progress."

As Sirius scoffed, James scrubbed a hand through his hair. "She didn't agree to go with him. She asked _him_ to go with _her_. I think if I was making progress, she would have asked _me_."

Sirius nodded, clapping James on the shoulder. "Right. I'm glad to see you've finally seen sense. Here's the plan. I say we prank Fenwick until he wishes he wasn't born. And none of that tosh I just suggested. Something good. And then we find you a nice bird to settle down with. Or, even better, shag while still keeping your options open."

Peter nodded excitedly, agreeing with Sirius, but James and Remus both shook their heads.

"I'm not going to prank Fenwick. He's a decent bloke. I'd know; I've quidditch practice with him every week, and he's still giving me lessons." When Sirius made a choking noise, James brushed it off. "He is. And he definitely has his head on straight when it comes to Voldemort." James shrugged. "I think the time has passed for hexing people who are on the right side, just because they annoy me. There's a war on, you know." He looked determined as he said it, as though he planned to run off and win it on his own.

Remus nodded. "I think you're right about that, James. And really, this," he gestured vaguely to James, "new attitude is probably only going to help you with Lily in the long run. You can't expect miracles, but I actually saw her laugh at one of your jokes at the last prefect meeting. Honestly, James, that's better than you've done the last six years combined."

Now that they'd each had their say, James was able to successfully shift the discussion to quidditch, and the upcoming game against Hufflepuff.

* * *

On the other side of the room, Lily was laughing as she relayed the tale of James' musical talent to his instructor. Benjy laughed, bemused.

"Honestly, Benj, you didn't think to warn him?" she asked, after finishing her story.

Benjy shook his head. "It really never occurred to me he'd try playing for you so soon. Truthfully, I didn't think he'd ever try. I mean, that's an awkward move to make from the beginning. 'I've got a guitar here. Would you like me to play you a song?'" he joked, putting on a smarmy voice. "I've played for years, and I don't think it's ever gotten me so much as a date." He shrugged. "I guess there are dangers to having a Maurader's confidence." He grinned at the thought, but shook his head in sympathy for James embarrassment.

Lily smiled. "It was probably better that it came out that way. If he'd played Halleluiah as well as Jeff Buckley, I'd probably have hated him for picking it up so quickly." She tilted her head, glancing over at the Mauraders. "Honestly, it's encouraging to know that James Potter is actually human."

"You're a bit hard on him, don't you think?" Benjy asked.

Lily looked at him in surprise. "Hard on him?" she sqeaked.

"Yeah. He's loads better this year." When Lily started to shake her head, he went on anyway. "I mean, you do realize that we've been out for an hour, and all we've talked about is James Potter." At her somewhat apologetic and _extremely_ shocked look, he laughed. "I'm not complaining. Honestly, I almost didn't say yes. Seems a bit disingenuous to try to help him win you over with the guitar lessons and then agree to go out with you to Hogsmeade." He shrugged. "I'm glad I did though. It offered a lot of incite."

When she jerked back, looking absolutely petrified, he laughed. "Don't worry, I'm not going to run off and tell him you like him."

"I don't like him," Lily responded automatically.

Benjy looked unconvinced. "Hmm . . . Well, let's say this. I'll promise not to say anything to Potter, if you promise . . . " he let the sentence hang for a moment, wondering if steam would actually start pouring out of her ears, "to actually consider saying yes the next time he asks you out." He held up a hand quickly. "I'm not saying you have to _say_ yes; I just want you to promise that you'll actually consider the question and the fact that there _are_ two possible answers." He cocked his head. "Can you honestly say you think you would have a terrible time spending an afternoon with him?"

"Can you honestly say you don't think it's a likely possibility?" she replied, mimicking his tone.

He laughed. "I would say it's a possibility, but not that likely, no. I think, whether you want to have been or not, you were charmed by his idiotic rendition of _Frère Jacques_. I think you were flattered that he went to the trouble of watching a football match and, as you yourself said, 'tried very hard to like it.' And," he continued, anticipating her, "you can't say that it doesn't change the fact that he's a prat, because he hasn't really been one this year, has he? You said yourself, he's been taking his responsibilities seriously, even to the point of rescuing first years from Peeves."

He smiled, holding out a hand. "Do we have an agreement then?"

Lily stared at his hand like it had turned purple and grown warts. She let out a long sigh. "I'll agree to consider it, but you had best keep that horrible mouth of yours closed, Fenwick." Somehow she could just never get her intimidating tone right with him.

"Fair enough," he said, gripping her hand. "Shrieking shack?" She nodded, and he dragged her off to speculate about what sorts of ghosts might haunt the famous building.


	5. 4:19 AM

It was 4:14 am on November 1. Lily knew the time and the date because at 3:52 am James Potter had come stumbling into their common room, obviously drunk and making a great deal of noise. At 4:12 am, she had given up trying to sleep and gone out to shout at him. At 4:14 am, she found herself a bit shocked to be getting the sharp end of _his_ tongue.

"You can't possibly tell me you go to that place! It's mad. Absolutely mad. You don't know what those girls wear." He looked at her suspiciously, as though wondering for the first time if she did know what those girls wore, and had perhaps worn whatever it was herself. Lily couldn't begin to fathom what girls he was speaking of, and was fairly sure she wouldn't want to know.

"You don't dress like that when you're a muggle?" he begged, voice dropping to a petrified whisper.

"I am actually a witch, Potter, all the year round," Lily snapped.

Potter waved away the insult. "Yes, but when you're living with the muggles, you've better sense than to dress like _that_, right?" He tried to look her in the eyes sincerely, but seemed to lose his balance a bit, backed up a few steps, and fell over the end of the chair. He looked pleasantly surprised when he found himself draped over the plush armchair sideways, looking up at her. Lily thought if there was any justice in the world, he would have fallen on his head and knocked himself out.

"I know I don't have any right," he started, then seemed to reconsider."Only, what I'm trying to say is, I understand that you're a girl."

"Thank you. Because I was under the impression that it was my masculinity that had you asking me out every other day," she replied dryly.

"What I'm saying is, I understand that because you're a girl, you might like to . . ." he trailed off, as though contemplating a thought to painful to continue with. "Or, I suppose, I mean to say that, well, there are boys, and as a girl . . . "

"Right, yes. I'm a girl. And I like boys. And that's allowed. And not something you have any say over," Lily clarified for him. "What I don't understand is how this has _anything_ to do with how I dress or what you're doing in our common room falling down drunk at," she glanced at the clock, "4:19 in the morning."

"Yeah," Potter said, standing quickly to prove he wasn't, in fact, falling down drunk. Unfortunately, he overbalanced, and somehow managed to bring Lily down with him when he fell this time. He seemed pleased enough to be stretch out on top of her.

Her fingers gripped his hair and she saw awareness snap into his eyes right before she yanked his head back and planted a fist in his gut.

"Right. Yes," said Potter, gasping as he rolled onto his back "it's only that you said you liked to go there, and I really don't think you should. Even if you don't dress like that, the dancing was, well," he stared up at the ceiling "not how you should be dancing with blokes you don't know. Or blokes you do know," he mumbled the last part under his breath.

"What," Lily snapped, straitening her pajamas "are you on about?"

"That place you said you like," Potter still directed his words to the ceiling, "Wicked. Sirius said he heard something about them having a big Halloween bash each year." He cut his eyes to her. "And I know I'm not, well, I mean, I know you don't like me like that, but I really, it's just, that's not a good way to dance exactly, and I really don't think that it's entirely safe to be dancing with a load of bloody gits like that, yeah?"

Lily blinked. "You went to Wicked?"

"Yeah."

"For Halloween."

"Yeah."

"And saw girls dressed like slags."

"Yeah."

"Dancing like slags."

"Yeah."

"And now you're concerned that I dance, and dress, like a slag."

"Yeah."

"Right," said Lily, glancing up at the ceiling and taking a deep breath. She looked Potter straight in the eye. "You're an idiot."

James opened his mouth, but realized he had no real response. He closed it and watched Lily turn on her heal and walk back to her bedroom.


	6. To the Americans

The next morning at breakfast, James sat down, one hand holding his head gingerly, as the other groped for a glass of water.

"Hi, James," Dorcas greeted brightly, causing him to wince.

"I've suddenly lost my appetite," Lily announce in a cold voice. As she stalked away, her friends exchanged confused glances.

"What happened?" Marlene queried. "You two seemed to be getting along much better this year."

James groaned and laid his head down carefully on the table. "It's possible she thinks I called her a slag," he said to the toast in front of him.

"James!" Dorcas chastised. "I can't believe you."

James made more pitiful sounds. "I didn't mean to. I'm not really sure how it happened. It's just that we went to that awful place."

"Oi!" Sirius broke in loudly from behind James, causing him to cringe and clutch his head. "I never want to hear you speak ill of that beautiful, wonderful establishment again," he said, seating himself at the table.

"You only liked it because there wasn't a girl in the place wearing more than lingerie," James replied, still addressing the toast.

"Absolutely. Fantastic muggle idea, that." Sirius responded cheerfully.

"You went to strip club?" Mary asked, shocked.

"What's a strip club?" Sirius asked immediately, looking as though he thought perhaps Christmas had come early this year.

"Wait, why would going to a strip club make you call Lily a slag?" Marlene asked James, baffled.

Sirius whipped his head around to stare at his friend. "You called her a slag?" he said, voice squeaking on the last word.

"Not exactly." When James' response was greeted with silence, he felt compelled to elaborate. "It was more implied than actually said."

"So the word never really came up?" Dorcas clarified.

James decided to risk raising his head, whimpering as he did so. "Well, it did, but not specifically in reference to her. More in terms of the girls at the club."

Sirius looked confused. "Why would Lily care if you called the girls at the club slags?" he asked. "Did she understand that they were in their knickers?"

"That was the problem."

Sirius sucked in a sharp breath. "James, I never, ever want to hear you refer to girls in their knickers as a problem ever again."

Marlene rolled her eyes and Dorcas snorted out a laugh, but they both eventually turned baffled eyes back to James.

Mary solved the mystery for them, though. "You thought since Lily likes to go to Wicked, she also likes to dress like the girls you saw there," she summed it up.

James nodded. "And dance like them," he said, in a distraught tone.

"And dance like them!" Sirius repeated, his eyes seeming to unfocus pleasantly.

Dorcas and Marlene exchanged another pair of confused looks before turning to Mary for an explanation.

"Well, I'm not entirely sure how they were dancing, but I don't know that Lily quite goes in for the American-style Halloween celebrations," Mary responded delicately.

"American-style?" James and Sirius asked together.

"My understanding is that they take a normal costume idea, like, for instance, a pirate, and add the word slutty to the front of it. Then they proceed to dress like a 'slutty pirate' or a 'slutty nurse' or a 'slutty cat.' Basically it consists of some sort of themed lingerie, possibly coupled with a few accessories around the head and neck," she gestured vaguely to the areas in question, "and just general reveling in the idea that no one can call them a slag, because everyone else is dressed just as scandalously."

Sirius raised his glass. "To the Americans," he said, and drank deeply.

James, on the other hand, was entirely focused on Mary. "So, Lily doesn't dress like that? Even when she goes to that club?"

Mary shrugged. "I can't say for sure, but she's been here every Halloween since she was eleven, and I really don't see her dressing like a slag at the age of ten. And honestly, that particular style of celebration for Halloween hasn't exactly caught on completely here, so I don't know that she'd do it, even if she was in Muggle London."

"And the dancing? That's Halloween specific too?" James asked, the hope in his voice palpable.

"Well," Mary considered, "I would expect that the girls who go to Wicked for their Halloween bash would dance a bit dirtier than your average Londoner. But then, you can't expect them to be too chaste when the style of dance is called 'bump and grind,' can you?"

Sirius' eyes widened. "Tell me about this 'bump and grind' dancing," he said, leaning forward so as not to miss a single word.

"Oi. More important matters here, mate," James cut it. "Does Lily do it?" he asked Mary quickly, before Sirius could pursue his line of questioning.

"Umm . . . Yes, but I think Lily tends to dance more with friends, like. And girls, usually, at that," Mary responded.

Sirius turned slowly to look at Marlene. "I," he said, enunciating carefully, "would definitely like to see that." Marlene kicked him under the table at the same moment James clobbered him in the back of the head.

When James turned back to Mary, she was looking at him seriously. "It's a fairly normal form of muggle dancing, James. It's not on at all to call her a slag for liking it."

"I was just . . . ugh," James laid his head back down on the table. "Am I supposed to like the idea of her dancing like that with some random bloke?" he asked plaintively.

Sirius considered the question. "Well, I don't think it's so much that you dislike the idea of her dancing like that with a random bloke, as that you dislike the idea of her dancing like that with any bloke that's not you," he said, thoughtfully.

Mary laughed. "He has a point. Somehow I can't see you complaining about her grinding up on you."

James closed his eyes. "At this point, I'd gladly just take a smile." He groaned pitifully. "I'm never going to be able to fix this, am I?"

"Probably not," Marlene responded, unconcerned. "But, really, all you can do is try. Apologize and hope she accepts it."

Mary nodded. "I suggest some heavy groveling."

Dorcas grinned. "Possibly also you should make it clear that you don't – in any way, shape, or form – think that she's a slag."

"I don't," James replied, raising his head. "I just can't stand the idea of anyone touching her or, you know, looking at her."

"Right, well, unless you plan on locking her in a dungeon somewhere, I think you might have to get over that little issue there, Prongs," Sirius said, clapping him on the shoulder as he stood. "I'm off then. All this talk of excellent muggle customs has got me in the mood for a bit of a snog."

James shook his head at his friend before heading up to his old dormitory, hoping that Remus might have a suggestion for how to get back into Lily's good graces.


	7. Absolute Bollucks

That evening, James found Lily in the common room, studying for Charms. She glanced up when he entered, but went right back to her reading without a word.

"Listen, Lily," he started, but broke off quickly at her look.

"I'm not interested," she said, in a deceptively calm voice.

He took a deep breath. "Remus says his best advice is just to apologize and make sure I really mean it, so – "

"I'm not interested in what Remus says."

"And Mary said groveling was in order. Serious groveling," he added. When Lily just glared, he continued. "And Dorcas says I should make it clear that in no way do I think you are a slag."

Lily snapped her book shut and rose to leave, but James' next sentence stopped her in her tracks.

"But I think that's just absolute bollocks," he said.

Lily spun around to glare at him. "Right, because it's clear from –"

This time James cut her off. "Why in the bloody hell would I spend _seven_ _years_ chasing after you if I thought you were a slag?"

Lily's mouth snapped closed.

"Honestly, I understand that you think I'm a prat, and that you would be happier if I jumped off a bloody cliff, but you're not daft, and anyone a tenth as brilliant as you should have the sense to know I'd _never_ fancy a girl I thought was a slag."

"Of course you would," Lily shouted. "You and Sirius have probably shagged half the female population of the school, between you. I really think the best solution here is for me to go out and find you a bloody redhead with a relatively attractive face and an acceptable body and you'd be perfectly happy with the substitution."

"If you could find me a redhead with a gorgeous face and a fantastic body I wouldn't be happy with the bloody substitution!" James shouted back. "You think I've spent years making an arse of myself because I like your _hair_? Are you completely mad?"

"Well, obviously it's not about my personality," she responded, hands on her hips.

"Of course not," he replied sarcastically. "It's not that you're ruddy brilliant, or that you stand up for absolutely everyone, even the people who don't deserve it, or that you're not afraid to tell me when I'm being a prat, or that you're too ruddy stubborn to ask for help, even when you need it, or that your eyes crinkle to bloody perfection when you laugh, or that you comfort first years when they're homesick, or that you have a cheeky response to everything, or that you'll take the time to tutor someone if they're struggling, even if you don't _have_ the bloody time, or that your eyes turn a brighter shade of green when you're angry, and you lick your lips every time you see strawberries, and you have to struggle to keep from crying on your birthday when your absolute _cow_ of a sister refuses to sign your card." James was breathing heavily and clearly just beginning to realize that he'd been shouting at her.

Lily opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't manage to formulate any words and closed it again. As James, now wide-eyed and bright red, turned to leave, she caught his arm.

"James, I –" but she didn't get any farther.

"It's not that I expect you to like me," he said, shaking his head. "I know you don't. And I know Mary's right, that I never really had a chance after that first train ride. But, I just, I don't want anyone else. And I keep trying to prove that I'm not the same person I was. I know I was a bastard. I know you were right about all of that. I was arrogant, and I was a bully, and I was an absolute toerag. But I don't want the rest of my life to be decided by the way I was at 11, or 13, or 16. And I'm running out of ways to try to make you see that I can be better. That you made me see who I was, and I don't want to be that person anymore. I want to be someone else. I want to be someone you'd like, someone you'd respect. Someone you'd think was decent. And I know I can't be a muggleborn, or a footballer, or a brilliant guitar player, but if you like those things, I can try. I can go to football games, and I can learn to play the bloody guitar. And I know I looked like an idiot that first time, and it probably only proved I hadn't changed. But I'll wait to play for you again until Fenwick says I'm good enough. And I'll – "

"James," Lily said, but he didn't seem to hear her.

"It's just that I feel like I'm running out of time," he said, dragging his fingers through his hair and leaving it standing straight up. "I've only got this year, and then I won't even be living in the same building as you or taking classes with you, and if I can't even get a date with you when you're _stuck_ with me, how could I possibly expect to get one after Hogwarts. And I can't stand the idea that I'll never even have a chance to –"

"James," Lily tried again, but he seemed unwilling to stop, so she caught his face with her hands and leaned forward, pressing her lips against his.

He shifted his mouth experimentally under hers, grazing her bottom lip with his teeth. When she pulled back, he leaned his forehead against hers, breathing deeply and watching as her own teeth scraped over her lip, unconsciously mimicking his earlier movement. He rubbed his nose against hers, breathing in her scent.

He watched her swallow and inhale slowly. "I think we should work on being friends," she said.

James closed his eyes for a moment, before nodding with his forehead still against hers. "Just out of curiosity, do you usually kiss your friends like that."

Lily carefully took a full step back from him. Keeping eye contact the whole time, she shook her head slowly.

James felt a smile spread across his face. He nodded again. "I'd like to be friends."

Lily nodded, still watching him. "Ok," she said, looking away for the first time and tucking her hair behind her ears. "I should probably get to bed now. I think it's late."

James shoved his hands in his pockets, shuffling a bit. "Listen, Lily, if you wouldn't mind, do you think maybe in the morning you could, I dunno, let me know this actually happened." At her confused look, he continued. "It's just that, sometimes I have dreams like this," he looked down, pulling a hand out of his pocket and scrubbing it through his hair. "Not that I dream about you all the time, I mean, I do, but . . . well . . . just . . . " He looked a little mortified. "Anyway . . . I've woken up and thought it was real so many times when it wasn't that I've learned to just assume it was a dream." He glanced up at her. "But I don't want to believe this was a dream when it really happened."

When she didn't say anything, he started looking panicked. "I'm not going to say anything to anyone," he rushed to assure her. "And you don't have to mention that we kissed if you don't want to. You could just," he shrugged awkwardly, "I dunno, say something about us being friends now."

She watched him for a long moment before nodding. "Goodnight, James." She couldn't help smiling a bit when he had just won the lottery. She shook her head and headed off to her room, clearly not quite willing to contemplate what she had just done.

"Goodnight, Lily," he responded, belatedly. He turned in a full circle, eying the room as though he wanted to ensure that he didn't forget a single detail of the wonderful place. He headed off to his bedroom, a bounce in his step, though he knew he wasn't going to risk his luck by going to sleep.


	8. We're Friends, and I Just

When Lily woke up, she found James in the common room.

"Hi!" he said, bounding out of his chair to greet her. She eyed him cautiously as he grinned at her.

"Right," he nodded, "so, I know you aren't keen on gifts when you don't think they're at appropriate times or from people who have the right to be giving you presents," he said, having learned the lesson in third, fourth, fifth, and sixth year. "But," he smiled brightly, "I think friends can give each other presents, and to commemorate our new friendship, I made you this."

Lily stared at his hand, which held a silver necklace. "James, this really isn't what I meant when I said friends." She was not sure whether the widening of his grin meant he'd heard her, or that he'd heard her call him by his first name again and lost the thread of the sentence in his obvious jubilation. "Friends don't usually give each other expensive jewelry for no reason at all." She took a deep breath, eyes glancing up toward the ceiling before shifting back to him. "And, it's not as though you could have gotten it _after_ we decided to be friends, because we just decided that last night."

James continued smiling brightly. "First, it's not expensive. I said that I made it, not that I bought it. Which also, come to that, should alleviate your concern about me having bought it before we decided to be friends. I just," he shrugged, dropping his hand, "couldn't sleep last night. So rather than channel my energy into something destructive like pranking, I thought I would make you something to show that I'm thrilled with the idea of being your friend." He examined the necklace as he spoke. "And, well, as to the other, I think friends should be able to give friends gifts for no reason. Wouldn't you rather get something from someone just because it reminded them of you, or because they were thinking of you, than because you were born on a particular day however many years ago and custom says they should honor that by buying you something?" He offered the necklace to her again.

She considered him for a moment before gingerly accepting the gift. It was a silver Lily, with what looked like – but couldn't possibly have been – real diamonds sparkling on it. She sighed. "It's beautiful, James, really, but it's not the sort of thing you give a _friend._"

"Sure it is," he replied cheerfully. "I'm your friend now, and I've just given it to you." He shrugged. "It not as though you have to wear it."

She looked up in surprise. "This is not the sort of thing you have and don't wear!"

"Well then," he said brightly, taking the necklace back from her, "let me just help you with that." He undid the clasp, smile widening as she lifted her hair away from her neck in acquiescence. He put the necklace on her carefully, trying hard not to take advantage to the situation by brushing his fingers along her neck, or running them through her hair.

"James," Lily said, tilting her head and shifting a bit to meet his eye, "did you just sniff me?" She shook her head at his obviously guilty look. "Friends do not sniff each other."

"Sure they do," James began, "We're friends, and I just –" He broke off when Lily huffed out a breath. He lifted both hands in a gesture of surrender. "Sorry," he said, not sounding the least bit repentant. "I'll try not to let it happen again. I just thought I should test out how it smelled on you."

She rolled her eyes, but James saw her lips turn up a bit at the corners. He reached out to touch the necklace that now hung from her neck. "It certainly looks good."

"Thank you," she said casually. Lily started to leave, but paused and turned back to look at him for a moment. Walking gracefully over, she stopped directly in front of him, rose on her toes, and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "Really. Thank you. It's lovely. And a very sweet gesture. Even if it isn't _quite_ in keeping with the intended spirit of our new friendship."

James didn't seem entirely capable of forming coherent thoughts, so she left him smiling dazedly in the common room.


	9. Might Actually Die From It

As James walked to breakfast, he left everyone in his wake with a muddled impression of a child who had been given springy shoes for Christmas and was absolutely delighted with them. He was fairly sure he'd greeted people he didn't even like, and almost positive he'd gotten their names wrong. But that certainly wasn't going to put a damper on his perfect day.

"Good morning, Sirius," he called out as he approached the Gryffindor table. "Marlene, lovely day isn't it?" he said, nodding. "Remus, mate, you're looking quite _refreshed_ this morning," he said, clapping the permanently worn boy on the shoulder. He saw Lily glance his way. "Lily," he smiled, savoring the sound.

Three heads turned toward Lily, back to James, and back to Lily, before finally settling on James, as he was clearly the one displaying signs of madness. "Oi," said Sirius, "did she agree to go out with you then?" When James shook his head but kept his spirits, Sirius looked perplexed. "What in the name of Merlin's saggy left tit has you in such a good mood then?"

James grinned. "She said we should be friends." He snagged a piece of toast, slathered it with jam, and bit into it with gusto. Sirius continued to look baffled.

"Isn't that a bad thing?" Marlene ventured. Tossing a quick look at Lily, she added, "From your perspective, I mean. Others obviously could feel different."

James shook his head. "Are you mad? It's a bloody fantastic thing. Bit like Dumbledore announcing that there will never be another exam, ever, and all lessons will be conducted in the form of a yearlong prank war. Except," he considered, "come to that, I really think Dumbledore announcing something to that effect is much more conceivable than Lily even agreeing to tolerate me as an acquaintance."

Marlene smiled at his comparison. "Well, you two have been getting along much better this year. At least, up until certain words were exchanged. It doesn't seem like friends is such a huge step as long as you've sorted out your recent differences."

James shook his head, still grinning. "Lily trying to tolerate me is conceivable. Lily being willing to say, actually _say_ – out loud – that we are friends, is something completely different. It's like rearranging the continents. Or switching the sky with the sea. She's always thought I was detestable. If she's willing to be friends with me, she must not think so anymore."

"Technically," corrected Lily from a few seats down, "I said we should _try_ to be friends. I didn't say we _were_ friends."

James shook his head, excellent mood still one hundred percent intact. "Nope, you can't take it back now. _Last night_ you said we should _try_ to be friends, but _this morning_, when I said we _were_ friends, you didn't disagree." He nodded sharply. "Which," he added, "clearly means you agree that we're friends." He grinned at her again, smiling all the wider when she rolled her eyes, because he – like everyone else at the table – could clearly tell she was more amused than annoyed.

Sirius looked apprehensive. "I never thought I'd say this, mate, but I almost have to hope she never agrees to go out with you." At James' shocked looked, Sirius shrugged apologetically. "If this is how you react to her saying you can be _friends,_ I really think if she ever shagged you, you might actually die from it." He looked one hundred percent genuine in his concern.

* * *

_Super short, I know. I actually wrote most of what I've posted so far over the course of a couple of days last week and have just been editing and posting since I created an account. Now I'm undecided on whether or not I want to continue. I had some ideas that I thought might be entertaining (possibly Sirius trying to throw a muggle themed party with the hope of seeing lots of wonderful muggle dancing; possibly Lily drinking a bit too much at said party and getting a little frisky with James), but I'm not sure. Let me know if you're interested in seeing the story continue. I am historically known to cave to peer pressure, but I'm also well versed in laziness._

_- Naj  
_


	10. Lime! Lime!

James had tried, very hard, to talk Sirius out of it. There wasn't even a reason to be throwing a party in the first place. And James was very concerned that somehow this night would end with Lily believing he thought she was a slag. Of course, trying to talk Sirius out of something –especially when it was a bad idea – was a bit like trying to convince the sun it shouldn't rise. Needless to say, James had failed.

He leaned casually against the wall of the room they'd chosen for the party. He had no idea where Sirius had found out about it, and he was fairly sure Padfoot didn't know himself. James shrugged it off. In a castle that rearranges itself regularly, finding a room perfect for a covert party where a coat cupboard had once been wasn't really all that shocking.

James watched with concern as Lily and Mary explained to Dorcas and Marlene the best way to take _tequila _shots. He'd seen muggle girls take them at the club that didn't warrant mention. It did explain his apprehension though. Sirius had managed to make loud, thumping music play in the room, too. It was very like what they'd heard on Halloween. He was surprised to find that muggle men didn't sing so much as talk with a sort of rhythm. Occasionally James saw Lily or Mary move to the beat, usually eliciting a laughing response from the other. Sirius seemed delighted with their apparent willingness to dance.

As James watched, Lily licked her wrist, threw back a shot, and shoved a lime in her mouth. Tossing out the lime, she gestured for Dorcas and Marlene to imitate her example. Neither looked quite sure of themselves, but they decided to go ahead and try it any way. James saw them lick their wrists and pour salt, as baffling as that seemed, on them. Lily poured four shots, apparently intending to take a second one. She and Mary explained something to Marlene, seemed to count down, and then licked the salt, took the shot, and sucked on the lime. Marlene and Dorcas followed more slowly, licking the salt off their wrists with looks of distaste. Each taking a deep breath, they threw back their shots. Dorcas immediately spit hers out, and Marlene looked as though she wished she had.

James heard Lily shout, "Lime! Lime! Put the lime in your mouth." Marlene obeyed, but Dorcas continued spluttering, trying to get rid of the taste. When Marlene gestured to the lime, indicating that it helped, Dorcas followed suit and shoved it halfway in her mouth. She immediately looked relieved.

Lily and Mary were laughing. Mary shook her head and seemed to admonish the pair. Sirius, who was watching from a few feet away, asked something. Dorcas turned to him with wide eyes and shook her head desperately. He laughed and walked closer as Lily poured him a shot. He pulled off each step quickly and seemed to respond to the whole process much better than either Dorcas or Marlene. He made a comment, and nodded sharply. He gestured encouragingly to the open space he had been determinedly referring to as the "dance floor" before walking off to join James.

"What was that all about?" James asked, as soon as Sirius reached him.

Sirius shrugged. "Oh, apparently muggles haven't sorted out how to make their alcohol taste good. The salt and lime sort of cancels the bad taste out, but the girls did it too slowly, so they got the full effect of the awful flavor." He shook his head, showing his disappointment. "Honestly. They even asked if it mattered how fast they did it, and Mary said for them to do it as quickly as possible."

"Did it seem very strong?" James asked.

"Dunno," Sirius answered. "Bit like firewhiskey, if I had to guess, but I'm not really feeling it yet, am I?" He glanced at the girls. "When do you think they'll start dancing?" He contemplated them hopefully, and was taken completely off guard when James' open hand connected with the back of his head. "Ooof. What was that for?"

"That," James said, "Was for engineering this whole night. I'm going to end up screwing things up with her again." He heaved a sigh. "She'll end up dancing with one of the muggleborns, and I'll end up smashing his face in with my bare hands –"

"Respecting the muggle theme," Sirius cut in. "I like it."

"And she'll end up hating me," James continued, as though Sirius had never spoken. "And it will all be entirely your fault."

"Now, James. If you choose to bash in a bloke's face, it will really only be your fault that she hates you. A smarter lad would take advantage of this generously created opportunity to have that lovely body of hers pressed against you."

"Right," James snorted, "so she can slap me for getting the wrong idea."

"I think," Sirius said, watching Lily grab Marlene's hand and dance up close to her, "that you would be getting entirely the _right_ idea."

James was relieved when Marlene laughingly pushed Lily away from her, gesturing to the fruity looking frozen drinks they had switched to after the tequila disaster.


	11. Entirely the Right Idea

James' relief was not to be long lasted, however. Two hours later he found himself watching Lily dance, quite energetically, with several muggleborns and a scattering of wizardborns who seemed to have taken to the activity. Sirius, naturally, leading the charge.

Sometimes the dancing was more funny than anything else. When Lily danced with Mary, they tended to make ridiculous gestures more than "bumping and grinding," as it had been explained to him. At one point, Lily seemed to cast a fishing lure, which Mary pretended to have caught in her mouth. Lily then proceeded to reel Mary in, both of them laughing.

Other times, the dancing made James distinctly uncomfortable. For starters, all the girls had elected to dress like muggles. Lily was wearing blue jeans which James thought were _far_ too tight. They rose low on her hips and did not connect with her shirt, which seemed to end as high as the pants did low. The shirt was black, and strappy, and far too revealing. Lily had left her hair down, and seemed to lift it a lot as she was dancing. James was surprised at the poor design of her shoes, which were strappy sandals with absurdly high heels. He didn't think they could possibly be comfortable. He was also forced to wonder if her coordination was better than he'd given her credit for. She hadn't stumbled once, and those things couldn't be easy to walk in.

As he watched, Sirius pulled Marlene out to dance. Panicking, Marlene dragged Lily with her. Lily just laughed at both of them and embraced the situation. James wasn't sure how sober she was. She had only had two other shots, but all of the girls had been steadily drinking the fruity creations, and James felt confident that they contained alcohol. He was fairly sure Sirius would not have allowed any drinks that did not have alcohol in them. It seemed key to his plan to get the girls to dance.

James was relieved that Lily was focusing most of her attention on Marlene, but disturbed that she seemed to be trying to embarrass her usually unflappable friend. She had pulled Marlene's hands around and placed them on her hips, proceeding to _grind _up against the other girl. Poor Marlene was laughing, and shaking her head, trying to pull away. Unfortunately for her, Sirius was behind her, apparently hoping to make a bit of a Marlene sandwich.

Lily laughingly pulled Marlene away from Sirius, and James thought it was sweet of her to rescue her friend from _his_ friend's clutches. They danced together with a bit more distance and Marlene looked relieved. James would have liked to have been, but Lily dancing by herself was almost as bad as her dancing right up against her friend. She twisted, and shook, and _wound,_ in ways he was quite sure would give all the other blokes in the room ideas.

When the next song came on, Lily laughed. She looked in his direction and made a sort of crooking motion with her fingers. Despite his best attempts, he couldn't stop himself obeying. As he got closer to her, he realized that the song that had started was a girl singing about a bloke making her sick. He thought if his brain could fully engage, he would probably be offended by that fact that the theme had made Lily think of him.

She grabbed onto his belt – he thought he'd managed a muggle ensemble quite well – and pulled him closer. Turning her back to him, she backed up until she was pressed against him. He thought he really wouldn't be able to take this for very long without his attraction becoming obvious. She caught both his hands and placed them on her hips, keeping them in place with her own. He kept trying to shift his hips back, so that she wouldn't feel the effect she was having on him, but she was having none of it.

As she continued moving, James lost the ability to think clearly. He realized that somewhere along the way he'd stopped trying to move away and started pulling her back into him harder. He dropped his head, brushing his nose along the edge of her throat, breathing her in.

As they kept dancing, James thought he might have heard Sirius say something. He looked up in surprise when he felt something cold splash onto him. He realized Sirius has spilled his entire drink, or possibly Marlene's entire drink – as it was one of the fruity ones – all over Lily. Marlene was wide-eyed, Sirius looked furious, and Lily was obviously struggling with shock.

"You're not even going to apologize?" Lily accused, angry.

"I don't think I'm the one that needs to, thanks." Sirius responded in an ugly voice.

Lily shook her head, clearly annoyed, and dragged Marlene off. As they walked away, James thought he heard Marlene say something about Lily not being able to blame Sirius.

James turned to Padfoot for an explanation, but he quickly realized the issue. Looking around, he saw that everyone in the room seemed shocked, as though they'd just witnessed a spell gone horribly wrong, but couldn't bring themselves to look away.

"What?" Sirius snapped. "You expect me to not react at all when she decides it would be a laugh to _toy_ with you?"

James opened his mouth to respond, but saw Lily leaving out of the corner of his eye. He looked back at Sirius. "I should probably make sure she gets back to the common room okay," he shrugged apologetically. "I think she's had more to drink than I first thought."

"Right. Just don't come whinging to me tomorrow when she wants nothing to do with you."

"Fair enough," James nodded, turning to follow Lily.


	12. M For a Reason

_ So, I had debated between T and M for the rating, and I think this chapter might push it into M territory. If you're not interested in reading it, you can just skip to the next one. I'll put a quick summary at the start of it, and you won't really miss out on any big developments._

_

* * *

_

When he got back to the common room, James found it empty. He thought he'd best make sure she had gotten to bed alright, so he knocked lightly on her door. When no one responded, he became concerned. Rushing to his room to get the map, he stopped in his tracks when he saw Lily lounging on his bed.

He swallowed audibly.

"You're alright then?" he asked.

"Mmm . . ." she responded. "I think that depends on who you ask. Sirius certainly doesn't seem to think so." She cocked her head, watching him.

He shook his head quickly. "Don't worry about Sirius. He's probably just had a bit more of that mad muggle drink than he should have. He'll be fine in the morning."

Lily considered. Rising slowly, she walked toward him. He tried to swallow again, but found that his mouth was too dry. "Marlene said even she thought I was being cruel," she said, coming to a halt in front of him. She raised a hand to fiddle with the buttons on his shirt. "Do you think I was being cruel, James?"

He shook his head again.

"Good," she said, rising on her toes and wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling his head down. She kissed him without any hesitation this time. She dropped one of her hands to run it down the front of his shirt. Gripping it, she pulled him toward the bed.

"Merlin, Lily," he said, breaking off the kiss and catching both her wrists to try to still her busy hands. "I don't think we should," he started to say, burying his face in her hair. When he went to pull back, she turned her head so that their mouths met. Distracted, he thought whatever he'd been intending to say couldn't really have been that important.

He backed her up until her knees hit the bed. They held off kissing long enough for her to scoot back along the bed. He crawled on with her, hands pressed to either side of her head, and lowered his mouth to kiss her again. When he lightly bit her lip, she moaned and arched into him. He thought Sirius might have been right, this could actually be the death of him. The thought of Sirius worked like a splash of cold water, and James managed to pull back again.

"Listen, I really don't think we should do this," he said, kneeling up with his legs on either side of her body.

"Mmm . . ." she responded, shifting so that she was kneeling facing him. James wasn't sure if it had been a question, or an agreement, or a disagreement. When her long fingers started unbuttoning his shirt, he hastened to make his case.

"Only, in the morning, you're either going to regret this or not remember it, and I don't think I could take either option," he said desperately.

Lily paused halfway through unbuttoning his shirt. "I wasn't toying with you, before." She said, deliberately undoing the next button. "I wasn't being cruel." She moved onto the next one, watching him. "Does it make me a bad person that I want you?"

"No," he shook his head frantically.

"I meant what I said," she continued, running a hand down the front of his shirt where it was already undone. "I want us to be friends," she said, brushing her fingers against his chest. "It's just that sometimes, I want more than that." She brushed the back of her fingers down his stomach and back up again, watching as the movement raised all the fine hairs on his body.

"I'm all for that," he said, breathing hard. "It just that, I want to know that you would want this, even if you hadn't had anything to drink tonight." He caught her wrist again.

Smiling, she lifted the hand he held and brushed the back of it against the side of his face. Leaning forward, she rubbed her nose against his. "I love it when you do this, do you know?" she breathed. "It feels like I matter so much more than I should."

"You matter more than anyone else ever could," he responded immediately.

She smiled, shifting, and somehow he found himself laying on his back, with her looking down at him. "You are so cheesy," she said, leaning down to kiss him lightly. "Umm . . ." she said, chewing on his bottom lip.

When he scooted back so was propped up against the headboard, she obviously considered objecting, but thought better of it.

"I think, for tonight, we should agree not to have sex." She threw a leg over his waist, and lowered herself down so that she was straddling him. "Do you think you can handle that?" she asked, bracing her hands on either side of his head, gripping the top of the headboard. "Because, I think, as long as we don't do that," she said, sinking into a kiss, "Mmm . . . I think as long as we don't do that, I won't think you've taken advantage of me." She caught his bottom lip between her teeth, sucking on it gently before pulling back to look at him. "Does that work for you?" she asked.

James nodded slowly, bringing his hands up to run them along her sides. "So this," he said, settling them on her hips, "is acceptable?"

"Mmmhmm," she said. "Absolutely." She leaned forward to kiss him again, rocking her hips as she did so.

"Right," James groaned. "So, I think we should have a second rule. Just to make sure that the first rule isn't violated."

"Hmmm . . . " she said, scraping her teeth along his neck before moving down to plant open mouthed kisses along his chest. He wasn't sure when the last of his shirt had been unbuttoned.

"I think we should agree to keep our clothes on," he elaborated.

"Oh?" she said, looking up from sliding her tongue down his bare chest.

"Trousers, at least. Definitely knickers," he said.

She smiled wickedly. "Who would ever believe me if I told them James Potter had an opportunity to get me out of my knickers and elected not to?"

James blushed. "It's just – " he started to say, but she rose up to kiss him again. Feeling like they both understood the boundaries, James decided it was safe to really kiss her. When he nibbled on the tip of her tongue, she moaned and jerked her hips hard against him.

His hands slid along her stomach, under her shirt. He brought them up until he could brush his thumbs against her nipples over her bra.

"James," she moaned, voice breathy as she rocked against him. When he started to pull the shirt up over her head, she shifted to help him.

He brushed his hands down her sides, memorizing her. Leaning forward, he kissed her again. When they broke for air, he switched to kissing his way down her neck. One hand tangled in her hair, he stroked slowly up and down her side with the other. When he closed his mouth over her breast, she moaned his names and arched against him. As her breathing grew more labored, he switched to her other breast.

Her hips were rocking frantically, both hands tangled in his hair, holding his mouth in place. She was moaning his name over and over again.

He flipped her over, cutting off any protests with his mouth. As their tongues dueled, he pressed his body against her. She arched up, clutching at his shoulders. He moved back down, sliding his tongue under the top of her bra. She was very nearly begging. He scraped his teeth along her, over her bra.

"Please," she moaned. "James," she arched again, pressing into him.

He looked down at her. He'd dreamt about her like this. Exactly like this. When she looked at him, eyes almost blind, he thought he might never recover from it.

He ran one hand down her body. Reaching the button of her jeans, he met her eyes. "I could," he offered, slowly undoing it. Still watching her, he slid his hand just inside the top of her jeans, brushing his fingers under the edge of her knickers. "Without actually taking them off," he said.

She nodded, gasping and arching when he slid a finger inside her. He brought his mouth back up to suck on her neck as one hand teased her breast and the other worked on things lower. He felt her hands clutch at his back as her breathing grew more labored. He slowed the pace a bit, smiling against her when he heard her say his name again. He increased the rhythm and felt her nails bite into his back as she called out his name.

"Merlin, you're incredible," he said, kissing her slowly. He took his hand out of her trousers, buttoning them back up again.

She made some vague noise that could have meant almost anything. He smiled, kissing her again before pulling back and starting to rise.

"Where are you going?" she asked sluggishly.

"I'm just," he said, leaning down to kiss her again, "going to step out for minute." He brushed a thumb across her bottom lip. "You will still be here when I get back, won't you?" he asked.

"Mmm . . . " she nodded, curling up and snuggling into his pillow.

As he headed toward the bathroom, James told himself firmly that he was right not to have taken more advantage of the situation than he had. Even if it meant he was in for a long, cold shower.

* * *

_Too much detail? Tell me now, so I know if I should just fade out in the future. _

_- Naj  
_


	13. All Evidence to the Contrary

_In case anyone skipped the last chapter, basically they hooked up, but didn't have sex. Lily was the aggressor. James was a good boy and tried very hard not to take advantage of the situation. I think that about sums it up. _

_

* * *

_

The next morning, James woke slowly. He'd had the best dream ever. One of those dreams where even as you're waking, you almost feel as though you're still dreaming. He could still feel his arm draped across her, feel her curled against him, smell her hair. He kept his eyes pressed firmly shut. Willing it not to – not to destroy the last remnants of the dream – his hand moved of it's own accord, stroking down her side. He marveled at how real it felt.

His eyes snapped open. Red filled his vision. He was definitely laying in bed with a redhead. _Damn it all_, he thought. He hadn't had anything to drink last night. There was no way he would have brought some random redhead back to his room to shag. Except, the evidence that he had was currently laying on his right arm. _Bloody hell,_ he thought. Even if Lily didn't notice it last night, she was sure to notice this morning. And it was bound to ruin all the progress he'd made. And the worst part was, he didn't even _want_ anyone else.

James delicately tried to extract his arm. The girl laying next to him mumbled something incomprehensible, rolling over so that she was facing him, eyes still closed. James stared. It was Lily. His mind frantically sorted through the dream he'd thought he'd had, trying to separate fact from fantasy. Tentatively, he reached out a hand and brushed her hair away from her face.

"Mmm . . ." she murmured, turning into his hand. That was definitely what she had sounded like in his dream. In his bed. Last night.

James shook his head, trying to clear it. He decided he must have gotten in a fight with Sirius, who hexed him, and even now he – James – was lying in a hospital bed, living out his dreams in a comatose state. He would have been furious with Sirius had the dream not turned out to be such a good one. Electing to embrace his fate, he laid back down.

He caught a lock of her hair between his fingers, marveling at the texture. He surveyed her. Somehow she had ended up in the shirt he was wearing last night. He thought he remembered coming back from the shower to find her in it. Which was not all that surprising, given his comatose state. He'd had many a fantasy of seeing her in nothing but one of his shirts.

Hours later, or possibly it was minutes, or even days – time is very hard to gage when you're unconscious – Lily stirred. She made little waking noises. James was quite sure the real Lily would sound the same. He felt a little twinge at the idea that he might never have the chance to wake up next to the real Lily, but shrugged it off philosophically. He was quite good at fantasies (when it came to her), and sometimes you're better off with the sure thing than the long shot. Sirius had probably done him a favor.

Lily opened her eyes slowly. She blinked at him a few times. He thought this was fair. Real Lily probably would have taken a few moments to assess the situation herself. "Hi," she said, tucking her hair behind her ear. He really was fantastic at this fantasy business. That was exactly the gesture Lily made when she was unsure of herself.

"Hi," he said, smiling. _He_ had no reason to be nervous. _He_ understood perfectly well that this was a fantasy. Which meant that it should actually end quite happily for him. He leaned in and kissed her softly, brushing his nose against hers. Fantasy Lily had said she loved that, and James was quite fond of it too.

Lily sighed. "See," she smiled, "I haven't even shouted at you for taking advantage yet."

James was a little surprised that Fantasy Lily would have brought this up, but there was a positive spin to it. She said she _hadn't _shouted, after all. And that was clearly a good thing.

"Are you alright?" Lily asked, brushing his hair back from his forehead. "You look a little . . . I dunno . . . strange."

"Perfect," James responded. "Well, a little concerned about Sirius and the lads, and my parents – Merlin, they'll be crushed – but it's not as though there's anything I can do about that here."

Lily sat up, looking surprised. "What? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Well, nothing other than whatever happened to me, but _we_ don't need to worry about that."

"Right," said Lily, baffled. "What happened to you?"

James grinned. "I'm thinking a hex gone wrong. This feels much more real than my average dream. I mean, think," he said, enthusiastically, "how brilliant it was of my brain to come up with this conversation." He gestured vaguely to the pair of them. "Usually Fantasy Lily doesn't question it if things don't _quite_ fit, you know. Because, well, otherwise Fantasy Lily wouldn't be any more amenable to my pursuits than Real Lily," he shrugged. "And that would sort of defeat the purpose of Fantasy Lily." He grinned at her, as though admiring a job well done. "But you're very realistic."

Lily blinked at him slowly. "Fantasy Lily?" she asked, her voice rising on her own name.

"Yup," he grinned. "Oh, don't worry," he reassured, "I usually just call you Lily." He scrubbed his hand through his hair, looking unsure for the first time. "This is a _bit_ out of the ordinary."

"A _bit_?" Lily said, slightly panicked. "Listen, I know you said you were concerned about not knowing it was real when I kissed you, but this is a tad excessive, isn't it?"

James shook his head, pondering. "No," he said seriously, "excessive would be you running around in black lingerie – complete with garter belt – as though you did it every day." He smiled. "I stopped with those fantasies in fifth year. Now the garter belt and whatnot only comes out for special occasions."

Lily blushed, eyes widening. "Right," she said. "Here's what I say we do. Let's agree not to say anything to anyone about anything we did last night." At his slightly confused look, she continued. "I know it might be somewhat out of character for," she looked distinctly uncomfortable, "_Fantasy Lily_, but since I'm not actually a figment of your imagination, and I'd still prefer us to stay just friends –" when he made a choking noise, she rushed on. "I would. I'm sorry, I know that seems unfair, but I don't think now is exactly the time to discuss it. You don't seem entirely in your right _mind_, at the moment," she added apologetically. "So, I say we just agree to keep private things private, and when you've determined that this is actually reality, we can talk more. In private."

"Right," James nodded slowly. "Breakfast then?"

"You go down first. And don't –" she began.

"Say anything about last night," he finished. "Sure," he said, shaking his head and looking bemused.

As he walked out the door, he mumbled to himself, "Startlingly realistic. Amazing, really."

* * *

_I fully acknowledge that this is a bit far-fetched, but – speaking as someone who has actually had conversations with people where it took me quite a while to realize I was referencing something said or done in a dream – I figured it's not totally out of the question and is fairly well in keeping with his character (at least as I've written him) for him to not actually believe it was real._

_Naj _


	14. Not Actually a Nutter

When Lily arrived in the Great Hall for breakfast, she found – not unexpectedly – that Black was still irritated with her. It didn't help matters that James was so obviously _off. _She really did not want to have to take him to the hospital wing, but this whole "Fantasy Lily" business was concerning her.

She sat down next to him, hoping none of the chemistry between them would seem obvious. She probably would have been better off if she'd taken Black's glare more seriously.

"Evans. Sitting on the bench?" Black asked in faux shock. "But, there's all of James' lap that you could sit in? Or do you only –"

"Oi! Mate." James cut him off, glaring at him.

Black grumbled, but decided to pretend Lily didn't exist rather than call her out. He did a lovely job of looking straight through her whenever someone spoke from her other side.

She glanced at James. "Tell me. Is this the sort of behavior you would normally expect Fantasy Sirius to display?" she whispered.

James choked on his orange juice. He gave her a look that suggested the phrase "Fantasy Sirius" had never once entered his vocabulary.

She smiled and looked away. Unfortunately, her eyes connected with Black's. He seemed to be having a hard time not commenting on their whispered conversation.

Lily clenched her teeth and decided she would just have to wait it out. She watched James out of the corner of her eye for the rest of the meal. She saw him react several times when his friends referenced the night before. She thought – or possibly just hoped – that he was beginning to realize it wasn't a dream.

She sighed, finishing her breakfast quickly and excusing herself to go work on her Charms homework. She could feel James' eyes on her as she walked out of the room.

* * *

When it dawned on James that he hadn't been dreaming, he panicked. There was really no other word for it. He had actually told Real Lily about Fantasy Lily. And the garter belt. And he must have seemed like an absolute lunatic the whole time. He was sure there was no recovering from it.

Relieved that he'd at least had the sense to obey Lily's strictures on not telling anyone, he considered trying to have the discussion about whether they were "just friends." He immediately discarded the idea. When you've just convinced the girl you're mad about that you are actually _mad_ over her, it's probably not the best time to ask her to go steady.

He decided to pretend as though nothing had happened. Well, first he had to convince her he wasn't insane. Then he could pretend nothing out of the ordinary had happened. To this end, he caught up with her in the corridor on the way to dinner. He was short and to the point.

"Right," he said. "So, I am obviously an absolute prat, but I'd like to make it clear that I'm not actually a nutter. I was just a bit thrown by the whole situation is all." He shoved his hands in his pockets. "Anyway, friends, yeah?" He offered, trying a smile.

She seemed to be a strange cross between relieved and suspicious, but she nodded.

"OK, then," he said. And that was that.


	15. Just Friends

The problem with being friends with Lily Evans, was that she clearly didn't understand the meaning of the word. Sure, she would laugh with him, and joke with him, and talk with him. All things that friends do, yes. In public, she made a fine friend. Sirius even seemed to have forgiven her. And he actually announced that she was an "alright bird," which from Sirius was tantamount to saying she was a goddess in wolf's clothing. He had a strange affection for canids, and he'd never been all that impressed with your average goddess. It was the combination that made her so potent. Sirius had always been willing to admit she was gorgeous, but he was just starting to realize she was _fun_ too.

No, the problem with Lily's idea of friendship did not lay in her public actions. It was the way she behaved in private. James wasn't one to complain about a lovely girl snogging him, especially if said girl was Lily Evans. He just wished he understood why she was so opposed to dating him. He was quite certain she hadn't told a single friend of hers that they had so much as kissed, and it was beginning to concern him.

Honestly, if all it _was_ was snogging, he probably could have taken the whole thing philosophically. He was, after all, getting to snog _Lily Evans_, which was one of his most cherished dreams. And he was officially – and recognizably – friends with her. But it wasn't just snogging. When they were in their common room, she would snuggle with him. Which is to say she would sit right next to him, lay her head on his chest, and proceed to study as though this were the most normal thing in the world. And she would kiss him in the mornings, and in the evenings, and really any time they were alone together.

Plus, she liked it when he played with her hair. Sometimes, when it was late and they were studying – which usually meant she was studying and he was pretending to study because it was the perfect excuse to be near her – she would actually lay her head in his lap. He knew by now that this was his cue to run his fingers through her hair. And he really didn't mind this. In all honestly, he bloody loved it. He just wished it made _sense_.

From things she had said, he had decided she probably didn't act like this with every bloke she called a friend. Occasionally he got the feeling she felt somewhat guilty for determining that they should "just be friends" while continuing to clearly ignore her own edicts (at least while they were in private). But nothing changed.

Several times he thought about bringing it up, but then he would think about all he had to lose. A part of him wanted to ask Remus' advice, but he knew he couldn't. It was probably just ego, anyway, wanting to have everyone know about it. Except, it really wasn't about them knowing. He just didn't like the idea that she was willing to be with him in private, but not in public. It made him wonder if she had actually changed her opinion of him, or just decided she liked snogging him.

When the portrait swung open and the object of his musings came through and smiled at him, he decided it didn't really matter all that much anyway.


	16. So That's It, Then?

He had finally determined to bring it up. It was really Christmas that had decided it for him. He missed her like mad and had written every day for the first week of holidays, instructing his owl, Snitch, to wait for a bit to see if she want to write back. Each time, Snitch had returned empty handed. She actually hadn't written him back. At first he was sure she'd found some muggle bloke she liked better. Someone she actually wanted to _date._ It absolutely ruined his holidays. And Sirius and his parents asking every other bloody minute if there was something the matter didn't help at all.

When he saw her on the train, she had smiled at him – _his_ smile – but hadn't run into his arms, _or_ turned away in guilt. He sat all the way through dinner, barely able to force down the food, just counting the minutes until he could get her alone.

"Lily, I think we need to –" was as far as he got as they walked into their common room. With that she had pushed him back against the door, apparently determined to snog his brains out. He knew, vaguely, that he had wanted to talk about something, but he couldn't seem to grasp _what._

Lifting her up, he switched their positions. As he pressed her back against the door, she wrapped her legs around his waist. He groaned into her mouth. When he kissed his way down her neck, giving her a chance to breathe, he heard her gasp out his name.

"Merlin, James," she moaned. "I missed you so much." She dragged his head up, kissing him again. Unable to think clearly, he set about getting her out of her school robes, which was never an easy task. Somehow they ended up on the floor, but she was down to her muggle clothes at least.

He started to move on to her shirt, but she shook her head, dragging at his robes. Acquiescing, he pulled them off. She made short work of his shirt, running her hands over his chest.

And then they were kissing again. He had gotten her out of her shirt and her bra, and had moved onto unbuttoning her jeans. He undid the button. She lifted herself off the floor as he slid the material down her legs.

He ran his hands along her thighs, which promptly locked around him as he leaned forward to capture her mouth again.

He leaned back again, sliding one hand down the length of her leg. "Merlin, do have any idea how incredible you are?" he asked, trailing his mouth slowly up, starting at her toes. She was watching him with that look – that completely _wanton_ look – that did things to him.

He grazed his teeth over her inner thigh, holding her in place with both hands.

"James, please," she moaned, arching.

He hooked his thumbs under the top of her knickers. "Do you want me to-" he left the question hanging.

She nodded frantically. And then, just as he started to pull them down, she changed her mind. "Wait, no, wait," she said, desperately. "Shit. I'm sorry." She scrubbed at her face with both hands, trying to catch her breath. "I'm sorry," she said again. "We should stop."

"Ok," he responded, watching her carefully. One of his hands was still trailing up and down her leg of its own will.

"It's not," she said, scooting back, "that I don't want to." She reached for a shirt, his – naturally – rather than hers. "It just, you know," she said, buttoning it quickly, "with us trying to be friends," her eyes skittered away at his dry look. "I mean," she tried, taking a deep breath, "I just don't think it's a good idea for us to go all the way right now."

"Right," James replied. "Not that I'm complaining," he said, "and honestly I wasn't trying to go _all_ the way, but would you mind explaining this whole 'just friends' bit again," he asked.

Lily nodded. "I know it sounds like complete crap when the first think I do back from holidays is drag you to the floor of our common room."

"Really," he said, shaking his hands, "I'm _not_ complaining." He mussed up his hair. "It's just that I don't understand it. In here," he gestured at the room, "we are most definitely not just friends. But out there" he waved vaguely at the Portrait hole, "we put on a good show." He shrugged. "I guess I just don't understand why it's necessary."

"Yeah," Lily responded, staring up at the ceiling. "Ugh," she said, covering her face with her hands. "It would just be so much easier if you weren't _you._"

"So that's it, then?" James asked in a dull voice. "It doesn't matter what I do; we're never going to get past who I was."

_Thank you to anyone who has reviewed so far. I'm glad I kept writing it. I am bound and determined to finish it this weekend. We'll see how it goes. __ If you have any feedback, I'd love to hear it. _

_Naj_


	17. No Kind of    Maybe

Previously on General Hogwarts: _"So that's it, then?" James asked in a dull voice. "It doesn't matter what I do; we're never going to get past who I was."_

"No. Look," Lily said, catching his arm as he started to rise. "It's not that I don't know the changes you've made are real. At least," she modified, "it's not that I don't _think_ they are real. It's just that you've always had such a _will_, you know? Do you remember in fourth year, when Sirius dared you to steal every teacher's wand a least once before the end of the school year? And you were caught on Dumbledore for _months_, but you managed it in the end. It took you the whole year, but you weren't going to lose the bet when the whole school knew about it."

James looked shocked. "You think this is a bet."

"Well," she said, "No. Kind of . . . _Maybe_." She shook her head. "It's definitely a challenge, at the very least. And I'm terrified of what will happen if you win it. Can you understand that?"

"You think this is a bet," James said again. "I've been chasing you for seven years, and you think it's all for the _challenge_?"

"I don't know!" she shouted. "That's the problem. I like you, and I want you, but I don't know how to _trust_ you! I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. So I set up these stupid boundaries. And I write you letters back, but won't send them, because you could use them as proof that you'd won. And I love just sitting – just sitting – with your arms around me, but I won't so much as touch you in public, because then everyone would know you had finally gotten me. I'll snog you until I can't think straight, but I won't have sex with you, because I know that if there's was anything Sirius would bet you and think he had a sure win, it would be to shag me before school's out."

James looked stricken. "I don't understand what I can possibly do to make you trust me." He stared at her, beseeching. "Tell me what to do and I'll do it."

She shook her head. "It's not something you can do, James. It's just time." She brushed a hand through her hair. "I want to trust you. But I'm terrified, because it wouldn't just be that you'd won. It would be that you weren't who I think you are." She dragged at her hair. "Ugh. I'm not making any sense. I know I'm not making any sense."

She leaned her forehead against his, breathing slowly. "It's not even that I'm afraid you'd win. It's not just that I would know you were the arrogant toerag I always thought you were." He closed his eyes at this. "It would be so much worse, don't you see? Because I _like_ you so much. And it would all – all of this – have been a lie. Can't you understand how much it would hurt," her voice broke, "if none of this, if you weren't – if _my James_ wasn't – actually real?" she asked, tears shimmering in her eyes.

"I am," James said. "This _is _real." He kissed her gently, nuzzling her nose. "It's fine." He brushed his lips over her cheeks where they were wet. "You can take as long as you want. However long it takes for you to trust me, I can wait." He caught her mouth with his again as she made a sobbing sound. "However long it takes for you to see that this is real, is fine." He brushed the back of his hand along her cheek. "When you want something this much, it's not such a bad thing," he said, "waiting for it. And now that I understand why it's different, in here than out there, I can accept it."

He stroked one hand down her arm until he reached her wrist. Entwining his fingers with hers, he smiled at her. "Will you tell me about your Christmas?" he asked, pulling her up and over to sit with him on the couch. She leaned against his chest, and he wrapped his arms around her. Listening to her tell him about her holiday, he thought he could wait forever for her, if it was what she needed.


	18. Nothing Off Limits?

Three weeks later, they were sitting in their potions class. James had decided to keep on with potions almost entirely for the excuse of being near Lily. Had he known how much he would prefer "common room time" with her, he probably would have dropped the damned subject. He wasn't going to be an auror. He was going to join the Order of the Phoenix and fight death eaters. Of course, when they won the war, he would probably need a job. So it may have been best he kept on with Potions.

Snape, the slimy git, was asking completely irrelevant questions at the moment.

"Sir," he was saying. "Is it true they are considering making Veritaserum allowable in Court?"

James thought the little death eater was probably concerned about what heinous acts would be uncovered if _he_ was ever given the potion.

"Well, Severus, there certainly has been talk," Slughorn admitted, but then he tried to shift the discussion back to the current lesson. "For today, we are going to –"

"But, professor," Sirius broke in, "that seems like a brilliant idea. It would be pretty easy to find out all of Voldemort's supporters. Just give everyone a quick sip of Veritaserum and ask them what they think of him," he suggested, ignoring the general reaction to his use of the feared name. "Not that some of them even need it, to spout their filthy opinions," he added.

"But think of the invasion of privacy," Slughorn gasped. "Imagine if your every private thought and secret were available to the government at the tip of a hand," he mimed pouring a potion.

"Imagine if your death were available to a load of gits in black masks with the flick of a wand," Sirius mimicked Slughorn's shocked tone. "Oh wait," he added. "It is."

"It is not without reason that the Avada Kedavra is an unforgivable curse, Black," Slughorn responded coldly. "And prosecuted most aggressively."

Sirius snorted in response.

Slughorn huffed. "Returning to today's lesson," he said loudly, and James tuned him out.

He glanced at Lily. She seemed to have ignored the whole discussion. He was sure she would have heard it all, but he doubted she'd come up with the same idea he had. He would have to talk to her about it later.

* * *

The evening, he shrugged off the lads, claiming he had a load of homework. When he got to the common room, he was disappointed to find that Lily was not there. Sighing, he got out his essay for Transfiguration and began working on it. It wasn't even due for three more days. The girl really was a terrible influence on him.

Two hours later, Lily showed up. Her eyes widened when she saw James doing homework on the couch, alone. "I thought Sirius said you lot had 'Marauder business' you'd be getting up to tonight?" she made it a half statement, half question.

James shrugged nonchalantly. "That was the plan, but I decided I wanted to be here instead."

Lily smiled and came over to join him on the couch. She leaned down to kiss him before settling her head on his chest. His arm came up automatically to wrap around her.

"What are you working on?" she asked.

"Transfiguration."

"Really?" she sounded surprised. "That's not due until Friday."

He made a vague sound of agreement.

"Who are you and what have you done with James Potter," she asked, drawing her wand in jest.

"I think it's more who you are and what _you've_ done to James Potter," he responded.

Lily smiled, curling into him. "Don't let Sirius hear you saying things like that. He'll be furious if he thinks I've changed you."

James shook his head. "Only for the better. Even Sirius would admit that." At her skeptical look, he amended, "Well, possibly not Sirius. But I'm sure everyone else would agree."

"You as well?" she asked, turning to face him.

"Mmmhmm . . ." he responded, running his thumb along her bottom lip. She smiled and leaned forward, lightly biting it.

"Listen, Lily," he began. "I've been thinking about it, and I've come up with a solution."

"A solution to what?" she asked in a lazy voice, cuddling into him.

"To us. You know, the whole trust thing." He felt her go unnaturally still against him.

"I thought we had agreed to just wait until it develops naturally," she said carefully.

James nodded. "And we can, absolutely, if that's what you would prefer, but I thought I'd offer a possible option anyway."

She raised an eyebrow. "Totally one hundred and fifty percent optional," he hastened to assure her. "I will definitely understand if you aren't interested, and will accept it without trying to pressure you at all."

She made a noncommittal noise. "And what exactly is your proposed _solution_?" She did not sound impressed.

"Veritaserum."

"Veritaserum?"

He nodded, hesitating to try to persuade her. He _had_ said he would not apply any pressure, after all.

She blinked at him. "You want me to give you Veritaserum," she said. "And then what?"

He shrugged. "And then you ask me anything you want," he said simply. "It's the only way for me to prove that it's not a bet, that I have no ulterior motives, and that I honestly just want to be with you just because I do." He shrugged uncomfortably. "I know it doesn't solve the problem of you being hurt if it turns out it was all a lie – which it won't , because it's not – but at least it makes it, you know, _private_." He said the word with obvious distaste.

She stared at him. "And then I ask you anything I want," she repeated. "Nothing off limits?" she asked.

He shook his head. "No, nothing off limits."

Lily nodded. "So if, say, I asked where Remus goes every full moon. . . "

He jerked back in shock.

"Or, for instance, how it is you and your friends manage to run around with a werewolf at the full moon without becoming lycanthropes yourselves . . . ." His eyes widened. "Or, in a related question, where exactly you got the name 'Prongs' . . ." she trailed off, watching him expectantly.

"How could you possibly?" he spluttered. "There's no way you could have figured it out."

Lily raised both eyebrows. "No, because it's not as though I had Severus whispering his theories in my ear for five years. Not that I needed to hear them in the first place. We did boggarts third year. It was _obvious_." When he looked stricken, she shook her head. "I honestly don't think anyone else noticed. He just seemed so panicked when he had to face it, and in combination with the frequent trips to the hospital wing. . . "

"You haven't told anyone, have you? You can't. It would kill him. It will probably kill him just knowing you know."

Lily sighed. "Of course I haven't told anyone. I'm only making the point that Slughorn made today, which is that people have all sorts of secrets, for all sorts of reasons, and laying them bare in an effort to find the answer to one question is entirely unfair."

James looked thoughtful. "That makes sense, but in this case, I don't think it applies." He ignored her incredulous look. "If you already know about Remus and . . . the rest . . ." he shrugged awkwardly.

"That you're an animagus you mean. An unregistered one."

"Yeah," he said. "If you already know that bit, there really isn't anything else I can think of that I wouldn't be willing to share with you."

"Mmhmm," Lily said, clearly disbelieving. "And if I asked what exactly your fantasies about black lingerie and garter belts had consisted of?"

James blushed. "I'm not saying it wouldn't be awkward. I'm just saying that I would be OK with it." He shrugged again. "If there's something you want to know, you should ask. I would rather you just know what the answer really is than think it's something potentially much worse."

"What if the answer is worse than what I thought it was?"

James considered this. "Then I guess it's better to know now, if it changes the way you feel about _this_," he clasped her hand in his. "It's only going to hurt more, if you find out something like that later." He smiled. "But you know what I was like, and – barring my early prattishness – I really can't think of anything worse than that."

"I'm still not sure if–" Lily started to say, but James cut her off.

"Just think about it," he said. "It has to be you that brews the potion anyway, because if it was me, you still couldn't really trust that I didn't fake it and tell you what I thought you wanted to hear. So, if you decide that you might want to do it, you can brew some. And if you decide that you definitely want to do it, all you have to do is tell me." He smiled. "All I'm asking is that you consider it."


	19. Despite Her Best Efforts

Lily couldn't help it. She thought about it. She knew it was a terrible idea, but it was just so bloody tempting. He had actually just offered, seeming very sincere, to lay all his secrets bare to her. She could ask him anything. _Anything._

Despite her best efforts at trying to put it out of her mind, she found herself in Charms, considering what questions to ask him. Some were easily discarded. Others, even the completely _ridiculous_ ones, stuck in her mind.

She looked down at her parchment and saw 'Did Fenwick tell him who Joseph Arthur is?' scrawled in the margin. She immediately scratched it out.

"Lily," she heard. Looking up in shock, she realized that class was over. "I've been trying to get your attention for like ten minutes," Marlene said, clearly concerned. "You were just staring off into space, chewing on your quill?"

"Sorry," Lily said, packing up. "I think my brain just disengaged."

Marlene eyed her, worried. "You've been acting very strange lately."

"Oh?" Lily thought she pulled off the casual tone quite well.

Marlene shook her head. "Maybe it's just seeing you get along with Potter." She grinned. "Honestly, if someone had offered me odds on that, I would have said no way in Hell would you have ever so much as given him the time of day.

At Lily's look, Marlene continued. "I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Really. It's nice that you're getting along so well. And I'm sure it makes your head responsibilities much easier. It was just surprising, is all."

In her rush to change the subject, Lily actually stooped to bringing up gossip about fifth years. _Fifth years_.


	20. Yes

She knew he was in the Gryffindor common room with his mates. She stood outside the door, telling herself to just go back to her own room and wait until he came in tonight to talk to him.

She would just go in and sit with Marlene, she bargained with herself. Just because she wanted to talk to him didn't mean that she had to do it right then. She could spend some quality time with her friends and catch up with him back in the common room later. That decided, she went and told the Fat Lady, who had been watching her in amusement, the password and headed in.

She felt his eyes lock on her as she came through the portrait hole. He always did that. Any time she was near him, she could feel his eyes on her. She heard Sirius mumble something grumpily and assumed he was chastising James for getting distracted. She smiled a little. It wasn't _such_ a bad thing, being his distraction.

She chanced a look his way. He had gone back to the game of exploding snap. He looked comfortable, leaning back in an arm chair. As it happened, her friends were over by his. She walked toward them.

"Hey, Mar," she said, settling herself on the edge of Marlene's chair. She rolled her eyes as a card exploded and Peter squeaked in terror. "Are you really telling me you have nothing better to do than watch this lot play children's games?" she asked.

Marlene shrugged. "I've already done all my homework, and we couldn't come up with anything more interesting."

Dorcas nodded in agreement.

Mary snorted. "Sirius tried to convince us to play truth or dare with Veritaserum."

Lily's eyes snapped to James. He gave the slightest shake of his head, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Don't worry," Dorcas threw in, "we talked him out of it. Honestly. Snape opened one big can of worms with that discussion. I remember it being all the rage to pretend to have spiked people's drinks with it in third year, but now that we're actually capable of brewing it, I'm a little concerned."

Lily could tell the boys were curious what Dorcas could possibly have to hide, but Lily and the girls had known about her _itch_ for Remus for years. Marlene called it an obsession. Mary called it a rash. And Lily just called it a massive crush.

Smiling, Lily could see that they were all considering what they wouldn't want people to know, if they were slipped some of the potion.

"I heard," said Remus, "that someone nicked a bit of Slughorn's. There's no conclusive evidence as to who this might have been," he flicked his gaze to Sirius, who laughed, "but it does seem that some has gone missing."

When all the girls glared at him in accusingly, Sirius raised his hands in protest. "Wasn't me. I promise. I meant for us to go _get_ some before we played. I didn't mean that I already had some."

Lily glanced at James, who was watching her carefully. She couldn't stop her lips turning up – just a bit – at the corners.

He smiled. "Right, then," he said. "The way I see it, there are two possibilities for the night. Either Sirius has the Veritaserum and uses it on us, in which case we all spill our deepest, darkest secrets (but probably don't get in trouble). Or, Sirius doesn't have the Veritaserum, but likely ends up getting blamed for it (along with anyone near enough to be tarred and feather with the same brush)." James seemed to consider his options. He grinned. "As head boy, I really think I should stay out of the muck." He started to rise.

"Oi. I didn't steal it," Sirius cut in, offended that he was being blamed for trouble that he –for once – didn't make.

James nodded. "_I_ believe you mate, but we can hardly expect the same from the teachers." He shook his head sadly. "And," he added in his most pompous voice, "as head boy, it's important I not associate myself with these sorts of scandals." He grinned. "Also, we've got a prefect schedule to sort out, and I don't fancy getting slipped a mickey with you lot around," he added in his normal voice. He looked a Lily.

She nodded. "He's right. We should work out the schedule. Somehow I don't think Remus would like it if we had him scheduled every night for the next two weeks," she added, knowing that the full moon fell in that stretch of time.

As she had hoped, it prevented any possible objections. As they headed back to their common room, she tried very hard to stop her hand shaking with nervousness.

* * *

They barely spoke on the way to the common room. Lily thought he might have changed his mind. She hoped he hadn't, but resolved to accept it without recrimination if he had. She cursed at the students in the picture quickly before climbing through the portrait hole.

On the other side, she found that her progress forward was stopped by James tugging on her hand. He pulled her toward him and kissed her soundly.

"Lily Evans," he breathed. "Am I to understand that you stole a potion, from a professor?"

Lily could feel herself blushing. "Well, 'stole' is a very strong word," she mumbled, knowing full well how ridiculous she sounded.

"Hmmm . . ." James teased. "Let me see here. Did you, in fact, break into a professor's classroom?" When she nodded slightly, he grinned. "And did you then proceed to raid his stores?" She gave another guilty nod, making him smile wider. "And did you rob him of his Veritaserum?"

Lily huffed. "Not _all_ of it. Just a bit. I _never_ thought anyone would notice." An awful thought occurred to her. "Do you think they'll find out it was me? Merlin, I'll be –"

James pushed her back against the door, kissing her hard. "Sorry," he said, pulling back. "It's just, I was afraid you were going to ruin the effect. I don't think I've ever been quite so turned on." He raised his eyebrows suggestively. "Lily Evans being _bad. _I like it."

Lily shrugged, feeling her face go hot. "It seemed the easiest way."

"And the fastest," James grinned. "I like this new _eager_ side of you."

"Right," Lily said, deciding the best defense was a good offense. "Have you changed your mind then?"

"Not at all," he said promptly, opening his mouth.

Lily felt her eyes widen. "I thought I would, you know, put it in an actual drink."

James closed his mouth, looking baffled. "Why?"

"Well, I imagine it tastes bad," she said. "What?" she asked, when he laughed.

"It's odorless and colorless, remember?"

"Oh," Lily blushed. "Yes, that does sound familiar, now you mention it." She thought it was completely unfair that he was about to have a truth serum used on him, and somehow she was the one that was acting like a nervous idiot.

"OK," she said, offering him a small vial from her pocket.

He shook his head, refusing to take it. "If I administer it myself, you might worry later that I hadn't actually taken it. It's better if you just do it." Again, he opened his mouth. She took a deep breath, unscrewed the stopper, and tipped several drops onto his tongue. He swallowed and smiled at her again, signaling for her to ask away.

"We should probably sit down," she said, gesturing to the couch. He nodded and moved over to the other side of the room. She sat in the arm chair, facing him.

"Right," she said, taking another deep breath. "I made a list." When he smiled at this, she added, "I know, you think I'm completely anal retentive, right?"

James shook his head. "Not at all. Organized, I'd call it. It's one of the many things I love about you."

Lily wasn't sure which of the two of them looked more shocked. "Hmm . . ." he said. "I didn't realize I would _volunteer_ quite so much."

"We can stop," Lily said immediately. "In fact, we probably should just –"

"No," James shook his head. "I knew it was possible it might come up. I just thought it would be more a matter of you asking and me answering. Not so much me just coming out with it in the first two minutes."

"Right," she said again. Her hands trembling a bit, she took a piece of parchment out of her pocket. "OK," she said. Looking up, she saw James smiling his encouragement. "Umm . . . so, have you made a bet about me?"

"Yes," James answered immediately, eyes widening.


	21. Such Complete and Utter Bollocks

_ "Right," she said again. Her hands trembling a bit, she took a piece of parchment out of her pocket. "OK," she said. Looking up, she saw James smiling his encouragement. "Umm . . . so, have you made a bet about me?"_

_ "Yes," James answered immediately, eyes widening. _

At Lily's shocked look, he rushed to explain. "Not like you think. That was a really broad question. We've made loads of bets about you." When this seemed to make matters worse, he shook his head frantically. "Not, well . . . yes, bad bets, but you know about them."

"I don't know about any bets, James."

"Well, there was the one in first year." He ticked it off on his finger. "Sirius bet me I couldn't get you landed in detention."

"You did that on purpose?" she screeched.

"Well, yes. But you knew that. Obviously I didn't accidently summon a load of flobberworms and put them in your dinner. It's just that the motivation had to with getting you to hex me – and so land yourself in detention – more so than just getting a rise out of you."

"Fantastic," she said. "You said there were loads?"

"Yeah, umm . . . there was the one in third year, when I turned your hair green."

"You made a bet you could turn my hair green?"

"Well, no. Technically Sirius bet me I couldn't make you scream my name. I think he meant it to be dirty, but he wasn't specific, so I still won."

"How charming," she said. "Go on."

"Right, well, in fifth year Sirius bet me I couldn't snog you," he said, rushing to get it over with.

"So you're just waiting until I admit it to collect on that one?" she asked, clenching her jaw.

"Of course not," he said. "He bet me that I couldn't do it before the end of the year."

"You never kissed me in fifth year," she pointed out.

"I know," he responded. "The only time I ever got close, you hit me with some nasty stinging hex that made my face swell up to twice its normal size. They had to take me to the hospital wing."

"How can you have lost a bet like that without me hearing about it?" she asked.

"Well, you probably did." He looked uncomfortable. "Do you remember, beginning of sixth year, when I loudly begged Madam Pince to shag me blind?"

Lily stared. "Yes."

"Right, well, that was the forfeit. Honestly, half our pranks aren't even pranks. They're just the forfeits for lost bets," he explained.

Lily closed her eyes. "I must be mad." She opened them again. Catching his concerned look, she felt a bit guilty. "What were the others?" she asked. Come to think of it, she didn't feel _that_ guilty.

"Other whats? Forfeits? Merlin, Lily, that could take years. And you've witnessed most, if not all of it."

She shook her head. "No, the other bets. You said there were loads, but you've only told me about three."

He considered. "Well, to be honest, the rest were all stupid things, like 'I bet James can't keep his fat mouth shut for ten fucking minutes about Lily Bloody Evans.' There were _lots_ of those," he said apologetically. "In terms of major bets, there were really only the three I already mentioned."

"There were no other bets that I'd want to know about?" she asked.

He shook his head.

"No other bets that I _should_ know about," she clarified.

Again, he shook his head.

"So you and your friends never made a bet about shagging me?"

James considered this. "I definitely didn't. And I don't _think_ they did. It's not out of the question that they might have bet each other behind my back, but none of them would willingly confess to betting that I would _never_ shag you. It would be way below the belt."

"Right." Lily glanced at her list again. "Do you know who Joseph Arthur is?" she asked.

James looked baffled. "No," he said.

"Benjy didn't mention anything about him, when you were having your lessons?" she pressed.

"No," James said firmly. "Is he some muggle you dated," he asked, looking unhappy.

Lily smiled. "No. He's a singer. He's got a song I really like, and I just . . . well, that first night we kissed, you said some things that reminded me of it."

"Which things?" James asked.

Lily shrugged. "You know, the stuff about me making you see yourself, and it making you want to change who you were."

James cocked his head. "What's the line in the song that you like?"

"_When you showed me myself, you know, I became, someone else_," Lily sang automatically. Then she immediately turned bright red. "I'm terrible singer."

"Yes," James responded automatically, eyes widening. "I mean, I love it. Really. I've never heard you sing. It's awful," he made a sort of warding gesture, clearly wishing the potion didn't affect him constantly, "but it's wonderful too. Really." He was breathing a little harder than he had been, looking slightly panicked.

Lily smiled. Leaning forward, she kissed him softly. "It's OK. I don't mind admitting when I'm bad at something."

"OK," he said, resting his forehead on hers. "I really love you, you know."

She closed her eyes, rubbing her nose against his. She felt him smile at her before he spoke. "You should go back to your questions. Can't leave anything on the list unfinished, can we?"

Lily leaned back, looking down at her list.

"Is it about my hair?" she asked, feeling incredibly stupid.

James glanced at her sideways. "_Sort of,_" he answered, clearly unhappy with his response. "I think it _was_ what caught my eye, in the beginning." He shrugged, smiling sheepishly. "It might also have been the motivation for all the hair pulling and hexing." He reached out to twist a lock around his finger. "It is, by far, the most beautiful hair I've ever seen, but I don't think I'd have bothered with you if there wasn't anything under it, you know? It might have been what made me notice you, but it wasn't what made me fall in love with you."

She watched him for a long moment. In a very small voice, she asked "do you think I'm pretty?"

His eyebrows shot up. "Are you mad? I think you're gorgeous. I think you're stunning. I think there could really never be anyone who could even _begin_ to compete with you." He lifted her chin. "There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that you are –by far – the most beautiful woman in the world."

Lily scrunched her eyebrows up. "I don't know if the Veritaserum is working. There's no way that could have been true."

James blinked. "It's definitely working. But it can only get me to tell the truth as I know it. If you gave this to Sirius, he'd probably say Marlene was the most beautiful girl in the world." He looked a little sick. "Please, please, please can we not pursue that line of questioning."

Lily laughed. "He doesn't exactly hide it."

James just shrugged.

Lily checked her list again. "So, how many, umm . . . how many girls have you slept with?" she asked.

James took a deep breath. "27," he said.

Lily stared at him for a long moment. "You understand that it's a little hard to believe you when you say no one could possibly compete with me. Obviously there are, oh, 27 girls that have managed quite well.

James shook his head. "That was just a combination of trying to get my mind off you and trying to compete with Sirius."

"Trying to compete with Sirius?" her voice rose as she asked it.

James looked down, guilt plain on his face. "We had a competition, fifth year, to see who could shag the most girls. It was supposed to have been all four of us, but Moony refused to participate and Peter, well . . ." he shrugged. "Peter is peter."

When Lily just stared at him, he felt compelled to say more. "In Sirius' defense, I think he was just trying to get me to explore other options, you know, since you weren't very interested."

"James," Lily said. "That's awful. I mean really awful. How could you possibly sleep with a girl just to, to _tally_ it on some bloody piece of parchment somewhere?"

James hunched his shoulders up. "I'm not proud of it. I stopped shagging anyone in sixth year, after . . . " he trailed off.

"After what?"

He closed his eyes. "I called a girl your name. In bed." He opened them again. She knew he could see the horrified expression on her face. "You don't have to tell me that's a crap way to treat people. I sorted that out for myself. Felt like complete rubbish and swore off girls altogether. What kind of a bastard shags a girl knowing full well he's going to pretend she's someone else?"

Lily just stared at him. He looked close to tears, "Who was it?" she asked finally.

He looked physically ill as he opened his mouth to answer, but before he could say the name, Lily covered his mouth with her hand. "Don't say it. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. It's absolutely none of my business. And if I were in her place, I definitely wouldn't want me to know. Merlin." Lily closed her eyes, imagining how awful that would feel.

"Lily," James said. "You know that song you said you liked? It's true you know. That you showed me who I was, and I realized I didn't want to be him anymore. That's what I love about you. You aren't afraid to tell me if I've done something horrible, and you've made me become someone who isn't, I think, horrible anymore. I don't do those things now." He stared at her, beseeching. "Ask me about this year, ask me about us, ask me about anything that won't make me seem like I'm still the complete arse wank I used to be. _Please_, Lily."

She opened her mouth, took a deep breath, and closed it again. Finally she managed to make the words come out. "Why do you want us to date, in public?"

He smiled. "Because I love you. Because it's hard for me to look at your hand, and not want to hold it. Because when you walk into a room in front of me, I want to put my hand on the small of my back. Because, when you smile at me, I feel like I've been coshed over the head with a frying pan." He paused. "And because I don't like lying to my friends. I don't like having to pretend that we're just friends. I want to be able to ask Remus' advice on how to fix the things I screw up with you. I want to be able to tell Sirius to bugger off about my girlfriend when he thinks you're out of order. And I want to know," he begged, "just bloody _know_, that this isn't just a fling for you. That you aren't just, I dunno, wrestling with your wild side. That I actually matter to you."

He rested his head against hers. "I know you don't love me yet," he said. "But I want to at least feel that you like me well enough to hold my hand in public and not be ashamed."

Lily closed her eyes, fighting back tears. "James," she said. She opened her eyes and found that he was crying. James Potter was actually crying. Because of his feelings. For her.

"God. How ridiculous is it that I gave you Veritaserum to make you tell the truth, when I've been the one lying this whole time," she said.

He looked stricken. He watched her, obviously waiting for the rest of it.

"It's such Bollocks," she said. "Me saying I was afraid that it would hurt to find out this wasn't real because I _liked_ you so much." She sighed. "Such complete and utter Bollocks."

She watched him pull back. Keeping eye contact the whole time, she finished her thought. "If all I did was like you, I wouldn't have been so scared. I don't know how you managed to make me fall in love with you, James Potter, but- " she couldn't continue with his mouth pressed against hers.

And that, as they say, was that.

_So, that's the end of "In the Sun." Points for anyone who caught the song reference right off the bat. I'm a little bit tempted to do a second fic that sort of covers the significant moments in their lives, post ITS. If you are at all interested in that, let me know. If not, no bigs. I'm content to leave this here. It feels finished to me. _


	22. Epilogue

_Epilogue _

She woke with his arms around her. She glanced over at the clock. It was still early. She had time to just . . . be. She burrowed into him.

She felt him shift, pulling her closer and mumbling something incomprehensible. Smiling to herself, she rubbed her nose along his neck. He continued murmuring nonsense.

She rolled a bit, propping herself up and gaining some leverage. She looked down at him. He wasn't exactly pretty. Or handsome. But he was hers. He was James.

She gazed at him. He did have wonderful hair, she thought, brushing it back from his forehead. And really lovely eyes, though right now they were closed. And a fabulous mouth.

Unable to resist, she leaned down to kiss him softly. She smiled when he kissed her back, clearly still asleep. Normally when he kissed her, it was with this intense sort of focus. Not like he was thinking it through or anything. Just like she was everything in the world to him at that moment.

This was different. He was just responding automatically. Like even in his sleep he recognized her and wanted to please her.

She trailed her mouth down his neck. Slowly, she began planting open mouthed kisses along his chest. She felt his hand tangle in her hair. When she looked up at him, she expected so see his eyes open and watching her. They weren't. They were closed, but fluttering. He was just beginning to stir. She couldn't imagine how he could still be asleep.

When she slid her tongue up his chest, and her hand down lower, she felt his fingers clench reflexively. She glanced back up at his face again and met his eyes. He pulled her upwards and rolled her under him, kissing her. Here was the intensity she had become used to.

She felt him slip inside her, and saw his eyes widen.

"Lily?" he said.

She nodded slightly, eyes closing on a gasp. She realized he had thought he was dreaming. She felt him try to slow his pace and shook her head. "It's alright," she said. She was a bit sore, but that didn't mean she wanted him to stop.

Still, he slowed down, moving his mouth over to her ear and whispering his love. She didn't think she'd ever get over hearing him say it.

Wanting to watch his face, she opened her eyes. "I love you too," she said. He didn't disappoint. She didn't think she'd ever get over watching him react to it either.

* * *

When they headed down to class, James wondered if anything would really be different. He glanced over, surprised, when she slipped her hand into his. He couldn't help grinning at her.

He pulled their joined hands up to his lips, kissing hers lightly. He watched her glance at him out of the corner of her eye, smiling softly.

As they approached the Great Hall, he found his nerves growing. Panicking, he dragged her off into a side corridor at the last minute.

"James," she said, sounding exasperated. "What are you doing?"

He sighed, resting his forehead against hers. "Listen, I think we should really think about whether or not we're ready for this."

She stared at him. "You've been saying for ages we should be together in public, and now you're having second thoughts?" She sounded shocked and hurt.

He shook his head. "Not about us," he said, kissing her. "Never that."

"Then what, James?" she asked, clearly confused.

He rubbed his nose against hers, listening to her sigh. "Only, I don't know that we've exactly thought through how everyone will react."

She pulled back, blinking at him. "Are you honestly telling me that all this time you've been pushing for us to tell everyone, you never thought about how they would react?"

"Not really, no," he said. "I just thought about how I wanted to be able to be with you without having to worry, you know? Not have to think about whether there was anyone to see me hold your hand or kiss you or say I love you."

She smiled slightly, leaning in to kiss him. "Lucky one of us actually takes the time to consider the consequences of our actions."

He raised his eyebrows.

"It's going to be awful, James," she said, shaking her head ruefully.

He sighed. "You're figuring there will be a lot of high fives and people saying 'way to go, James' aren't you?"

She nodded. "Something like that."

"I figured," he said in a dejected tone. "Listen, if it comes down to it, I'd rather have you," he ran his hands down her arms, linking his fingers with hers, "rather have us, than have people know about us. If you think their reaction might send you running for the hills . . ."

She shook her head. "That's part of why I waited so long. I knew if I didn't trust you completely, I'd take everyone else's reaction as a sign of your true colors."

He frantically disowned the rest of the school. "They're all idiots if they think I'm not serious about this."

She raised an eyebrow.

"Not that you're an idiot for thinking that before," he said quickly. "That's different. You have good reason not to trust me. Or you had good reason. And maybe they do too, but that's beside the point."

She cocked her had. "What was the point exactly?"

"That I love you," he said, kissing her. "And I'm not sure I'm willing to risk you."

She smiled at him. "It's not a risk, because I love you too. And if I do start to doubt you, all you have to do is remind me of it." She leaned her forehead against him. "I really do, you know?"

He nodded. Releasing one of her hands, he pulled them back toward the Great Hall.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Ready," she said.

He pushed open the door. They walked to the Gryffindor table. Silence fell as they passed. He could see heads turning, and elbows nudging, and eyes widening.

The walk to their seats was very possibly the longest of his life. He glanced over at Lily. She was watching her friends carefully.

He caught Remus' eye, and got a quick grin in return. And then he heard a seat scrape back. Sirius had stood up. He lifted his fingers to his lips, let out a loud wolf-whistle, and started clapping loudly with a slightly mad grin on his face.

This led very quickly to general – and thoroughly mortifying – applause from everyone but the Slytherins. He was suddenly very glad Lily had made them wait so long.

He glanced over at her again. She was smiling slightly. Her friends were shaking their heads in mock disappointment, but they all had grins on their faces.

He pulled them down into their seats, attempting to maintain as much dignity as possible.

Lily looked at him sideways. "Told you," she whispered.

He had to admit she was right. He couldn't really expect anything less from his Lily.

* * *

_Hope this satisfied any of you who were hoping for just a bit more (AceofCh and Sti, I'm looking in your direction). _

_-Naj  
_


	23. Glimpses: Perfect

_Sometime after graduation  
_

_

* * *

_

They walked into the apartment, taking a look around.

"I dunno," James said. "It looks a bit small, don't you think?"

Lily stared at him. "Small?" she said. "It's perfect. Look at this," she turned in a circle. "Hardwood floors. A fireplace. A balcony. It's lovely," she pronounced.

"But it's really only this room, the kitchen, and the bedroom," James said, unsure.

"How many bedrooms were you thinking we needed?" Lily said, playing with the buttons on the front of his shirt.

"Well," he said, already changing his mind. "I was thinking maybe it would be nice to have an extra one, you know where Sirius or the lads could stay if the need arose . . ." he trailed off as Lily raised an eyebrow. "But now I think of it, maybe it's best if we don't."

She wrinkled her nose at him. "Probably best," she said, nodding.

He readily agreed. "Privacy and all that."

"Exactly," she said.

James glanced over at the woman showing them the flat. "Speaking of, do you mind if we take a few minutes to look around?"

The woman smiled naively. "Of course not, dear. I'll just step down stairs. There's floo access in the shop down there. I can look in on a few things."

"Excellent," he said, turning to Lily as soon as the door closed. "Where were we? Privacy, right?" he said, backing her toward the bedroom.

"Get away from me, James," she batted his hands away. "There's isn't even a bed yet. And we definitely aren't christening any apartments we haven't even taken yet."

James turned to look at the closed door. "I bet I can catch her before she gets to the bottom of the steps," he said, seriously considering it. "I'll let her know we want it."

Lily shook her head. "Do you always think with your little brain, then?" she asked.

He acted as though he was thinking it over quite seriously. "Yes," he said, finally. "At least where you're concerned, that's a definite yes."

"Well, in this particular case, James Potter, I'll have to ask you to engage the _slightly_ larger brain," she said, tapping on his forehead. "Located up here."

He grinned. "I'm not sure that's possible," he said, leaning down to kiss her lightly. "See, you insist on being the most beautiful girl in the world _and_ you've agreed to live with me," he said. "I really think this James," he said, tapping on his head, "will be thoroughly enslaved to the _slightly_ smaller James," he smiled. "At least until I'm old enough to need muggle enhancements," he shrugged. "And have gone a bit senile."

She laughed, grabbing his hand and dragging him over to the balcony. "Don't you love it?" she said, apparently deciding to ignore his statement altogether. "It's absolutely perfect."

He smiled. Her delight was infectious. "Absolutely perfect," he said, looking at her more than the view of the building across the way.

She caught him staring at her and shot him a sideways glance. "You're an idiot," she said, obviously fighting off a smile.

"But a very sweet idiot," he said, kissing her again. "You told me yourself."

She wrinkled her nose once more. "That doesn't sound like something I'd ever say," she said. "I think you must have heard me wrong."

He shook his head. "No," he said. "I'm quite confident. It was right after you declared I was a god. And promised to love me forever and ever and all eternity."

She gave him a look. "Mmmm . . . " she said. "No, that doesn't sound like me at all."

He did a sad face, knowing she would soften.

"I may have said I love you," she admitted, "but I definitely wouldn't have said you were a god."

"Hmmm . . ." he said, thinking it over. "You're right. Maybe it was more of an 'Oh god, oh god, don't stop, please, James, don't stop' sort of thing," he teased, grinning when she smacked him.

"You're such an arse. How in Merlin's name did you ever convince me to move in with you?" she asked, shaking her head.

He smiled. "I asked very nicely," he said. He considered it for a moment. "And I think I may have made you breakfast beforehand," he admitted.

She nodded. "That sounds about right. I am a sucker for pancakes."

The woman showing them the place decided that was the best moment to return. James was relieved to find that his hands were only in appropriate places on his girlfriend's body.

"What do you think?" the woman asked.

"I love it," Lily responded.

James glanced back at the woman in the doorway. "We'll take it," he said, needing no further convincing.

* * *

_So, it's wicked short. I admit it. But it's not really meant to be a long scene. At least not in my head. Anyway, this is likely to be about the length of any additions I do on this fic, because I really just like the idea of short glimpses from this point on. If you'd rather I just cut it after chapter 22, let me know. If you want me to do a few more bits and pieces (proposal, wedding, pregnant, etc), let me know that too. If you just want me to shut up, don't read or review, and I'll probably oblige. _

_-Naj_


	24. Glimpses: Don't

_A while later . . ._

_

* * *

_

"Here's what I'm thinking," James told Remus as they walked up the steps. "We get everyone together round about nine, yeah? Then we drag Sirius out like we're taking him for drinks on his birthday, and then everyone can bounce out and shout surprise."

Remus laughed. "Though, with Sirius, there's a better than even chance he'll be disappointed we aren't actually going for drinks."

James slid the key into his lock. "That's a point, I suppose. You think we shouldn't do a surprise party then?" he said, opening the door and walking in. "It's just us, love," he called out.

"Tea?" he asked turning back to Remus. When he got a nod, he led the way toward the kitchen.

"I don't know if we should do a surprise," Remus said. "Sirius is a hard one to catch off guard. And even bloody harder to impress."

"That's fair," James said, rounding the corner. He stopped when he say Lily at the table. "Lily?" When she glanced in his direction, he saw she had been crying. Her eyes stared blankly back at him. "What is it Lily?" he asked. A horrible thought occurred to him. "Not Sirius!"

She shook her head, but didn't speak.

"Mary?" he asked.

"No, James. It's," her voice caught and she broke off. "I'm sorry," she said, scrubbing at her eyes. "I just thought they were safe, you know?" She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging them. "It's my parents," she said, laying her cheek on the top of her knees.

He blinked at her. "Death Eaters went after your parents?" he asked, shocked. He whipped his head around, immediately looking for threats. If they were hunting down her non-magical family members, _she_ certainly wasn't safe.

"James," Remus said, putting a hand on his arm and giving him a look. James turned back to Lily, watching her shake her head minutely.

"No," she said. "A car accident. All this bloody murder around us, and they –" her voice broke again.

He watched her shoulders shake. Helplessly, he turned to Remus. His friend just gestured toward her and quietly excused himself. After a moment, James heard the click of the front door.

He stepped forward and knelt in front of Lily. He stroked a hand through her hair. When she leaned into him, he lifted her out of her chair and into his lap.

"I'm sorry," she sobbed. "I know I should be stronger than this."

He shook his head quickly before realizing she couldn't see it. "No, lovely," he said, pressing his cheek against her hair. "I can't even imagine what I would do, how I would feel, if I lost my parents." He pressed a kiss to her head. "It doesn't make you weak."

She didn't say anything else, so James simply held her until the crying subsided.

He didn't know how long it was until she pulled back, wiping the tears away. He leaned his forehead into hers. "I'm so, so sorry, love."

She nodded, closing her eyes. "Me too," she said. He watched her struggle not to break down again.

He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "You know I'll always take care of you, don't you?" he tried to soothe.

She opened her eyes and stared at him for a long moment. Then she rose jerkily to her feet. "I don't need you to take care of me," she whispered.

He flinched, climbing to his feet. "No," he said carefully. "I just mean –"

"That's not how it works," she said. "I'm not a child anymore. We don't get to be that way. To have people just there to take care of us whenever something goes wrong."

"No," he said, trying to agree with her. "Well, yes," he said, confused. "I mean, isn't that what family is? What friends are?"

She shook her head, backing away. "I need to go," she said. "I need to be on my own."

"Wait, Lily. Don't," he pleaded, following her. "Please. You're upset. Just –" he tried to block her opening the door. "Please just stay tonight," he said.

She shook her head again. "I'm sorry," she said, voice breaking again. "I'm not trying to hurt you." She got the door open and stepped out into the hall, hugging herself. "I never meant for this to hurt you."

"Lily, please," he said, reaching out to her, but she turned and hurried down the hall without a single look back. He stood staring for a long moment and then rushed after her. He got to the bottom of the steps in time to see the night bus depart.

* * *

_ I know it's wicked short. This one and the next are actually part of the same . . . turning point, I guess we'll call it. But they really needed to be completely separate scenes. I'm hoping to have the next one up pretty quick here. _

_Naj _


	25. Always

James went to the funeral. He wasn't sure she'd want him there, but he couldn't just leave her by herself. They hadn't spoken since the other night. Two days. 59 hours. He tried not to count the minutes.

He had checked in with her friends, to see if she had decided to stay with them, but none of them seemed to know anything at all. James avoided mentioned her parents. He didn't think he had the right to tell them, if Lily had chosen not to.

He stood at the back of the service, dressed in somber black. Lily and her sister sat next to each other. James had the impression it was more for posterity's sake than any sort of familial bond. Her sister sat straight as a board. Lily looked very, very small.

James tried to focus on what the man was saying, but his attention kept coming back to Lily. He hoped she hadn't stayed with Petunia. They had never been close, but if her sister's demeanor now was any indication, James couldn't think of anyone he'd want taking care of Lily in a time like this less than her sister. Not that Lily needed taken care of.

James still didn't understand what he'd done wrong. Why shouldn't he want to take care of her? Wasn't that the point of love? Of family? Of friendship? That you're there for other people when they need you?

He let out a long breath. But somehow he'd managed to not be there for her when she needed him. To scare her off. She had lost the two people in the world who mattered the most to her, and James had sent her scurrying into the night. He had a horrible feeling she was staying in her childhood home. He closed his eyes, feeling ill at the idea of her alone with all the pain she must be in. And in a place full of memories and reminders of what she'd lost.

He hadn't been able to spot her there, but he couldn't think of anywhere else she would have gone. He had sat outside the house both nights, hidden by his invisibility cloak. He kept himself from going in, sure that she would consider it a grave violation of her privacy, but hadn't been able to stay away altogether.

He had made Remus sleep in their apartment and promise to notify James if she showed up. He didn't want her to find the place empty if she did decide to come home.

He returned his attention to the man speaking. He tried very hard for the rest of the service not to lose the thread again. He failed spectacularly.

* * *

Lily knew he was there. She had seen him at the back of the service. Now he hovered in the background at the cemetery. Petunia kept shooting him glares. Somehow after years of hating Lily for her magic, Petunia had found a way to blame her for not having magic at the right moment. Or for not being there to use it.

Lily glanced back at James again. She had had time to think about it, and she knew she had been right to end it. If her parents could die with no looming threat of Voldemort to affect them, how was James ever going to last?

She turned her gaze back to her parents, watching as they were lowered into the ground. She couldn't do this again. There were so many people to lose, and she couldn't. She just couldn't.

She focused on keeping her breathing even. It would be bad enough to lose Mary, or Dorcas, or any of her friends. Even his friends. But him. She closed her eyes. She couldn't even bear to contemplate it.

She didn't know how he'd done it. He'd just become , well, a part of her. She didn't know how to live without him. She didn't know how to sleep. She didn't know how to eat. She didn't know how to laugh. She didn't know how to _be_ without him.

She hadn't realized it could be like that. She had known she loved him. That somehow he had insinuated himself into her life, and she'd fallen for him against her will. But this was different. This was too much. This was more than she could bear to lose. And if it was already too much, how much worse would it be when she did lose him? How could it not break her?

Lily realized people had started coming to offer their condolences. She shook hands, returned hugs, and kissed cheeks, all in a haze. Meaningless words washed over her. She knew they offered comfort, but there was none to be had.

Lily couldn't judge the time, but eventually they all drifted away. Petunia and her husband had left without a word to her.

Lily sighed, looking down at the grave. She wished she could speak to them. Wished she'd had a chance to say goodbye. She whispered it now and backed away slowly.

She turned and saw James, still watching her.

"You didn't need to come," she said quietly.

He stepped closer to her. "Yes, I did."

"James –" she didn't get very far before he pulled her into a hug.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I know I didn't say the right thing. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to be here."

"I can't do this, James," she said into his chest. "I'm sorry. I know I'm hurting you, but I can't. I can't stand to lose you too."

He pulled back, brushing a hand over her cheek. "Is that why you left?" he asked. "You aren't going to lose me," he said.

She pushed him a full step back. "How can you say that?" she whispered. "We've already lost members of the order," she said. "And my parents weren't even a part of any of that and they're –" her throat closed over the word.

"You're right," he said quietly. "I can't promise you won't lose me. But why would you want to hasten it?" he said. "If you walk away now, don't we just lose each other sooner?"

"I'll only get more attached," she said, looking away.

He took her hand, pulling it up to his lips. "I don't know about you, but I'm pretty attached now," he said, kissing her fingers. "Can you honestly tell me you aren't?" he asked.

She opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't make the words come out.

"There's always a risk," he said. "Anytime you love someone, you run the risk of losing them. But that doesn't mean it isn't worth it," he argued. "If I lost you tomorrow, I'd be a wreck. I don't know how I'd get up in the morning, or –" he shook his head, not wanting to consider the loss. "But I wouldn't regret being with you," he said.

"I can't imagine how much it would hurt to lose you," he continued, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "But I would still have had some time with you. And that's better than never having been with you at all."

She leaned her forehead against his, breathing slowly.

"If you tell me you don't love me, that's one thing. But since I know you do," he rubbed his nose along hers, "I'm not going to give up." He smiled slightly. "I refer you to first through seventh year for an indication of my tenacity."

She closed her eyes, trying very hard not to cry.

"I know you're scared. I can't imagine how hard this is for you," he whispered. "But these are the times I'm _supposed_ to be here for you. These are the times when it's ok to need me."

She squeezed her eyes shut tighter, refusing to let any tears escape. After a moment, she nodded, forehead still pressed to his.

"I'm supposed to go back to the house," she breathed. "To decide what I want to keep." She slid her hand down his arm, twining her fingers with his. "Will you come with?"

He brought their joined hands up to his mouth. "Always."

* * *

_ You've probably sorted this by now, but I'm a bit of a review whore. It might be helpful for you to think of reviews as cash on the night stand. _

_You've got to pay to play ;-)_

_-Naj  
_


	26. Glimpses: Sick

_November . . .  
_

* * *

Lily and Marlene walked into the apartment after an evening out. The moment she was in the door, Lily slid out of her fantastic but incredibly uncomfortable shoes.

"I told you they'd drive you mad by the end of the night," Marlene teased.

"Shush," Lily said. "You have to admit they look . . . " she searched for the right word.

"Sexy," Marlene suggested. "I'm actually surprised James let you out of the apartment dressed like that," she said.

Lily laughed. "Well," she said, "he trusts me. Though it's usually a battle to get out of the bedroom when I'm dressed like this."

Marlene grinned as she wandered over the kitchen to get a drink. "Do you want anything?" she asked.

"Mmm . . ." said Lily, massaging her sore feet. "There's wine in the refrigerator, if you don't mind."

"There's a note next to this wine bottle," Marlene said. "Did you know?"

"No," Lily said, turning toward the kitchen. "What does it say?" She was already smiling.

"Hmm . . . It says 'Because for you, one glass of wine is tipsy, two is all my dreams come true, and three is far, far too much.' What in the world," Marlene asked, looking over at Lily, "does that mean?"

Lily smiled wider, resting her cheek on her arms as she looked over the back of the couch. "It means my boyfriend loves me," she said grinning. "And," she added after a moment, "thinks I'm a lightweight who gets a bit randy after two glasses of wine."

When Marlene looked baffled, Lily decided she should explain. "He'll probably hate that I've told you, and you are – under no circumstances – allowed to repeat it to Sirius or any of the lads, but it's just something James does. He leaves these little notes sometimes. They're just little reasons he loves me." She felt her cheeks flush, but still couldn't help being happy about it.

"That's sick," Marlene said. She brought the bottle of wine, little note, and two glasses over to the table, flopping down next to Lily. "Seriously. It's like when you're a kid and you go mad on Halloween, eating far too many sweets and making yourself sick. That's what you and James are." She sighed, looking over at Lily. "I'm very torn between being horribly jealous that your boyfriend leaves you sappy little love notes for no reason at all and happy that you're so obviously happy."

"Hopefully the happy wins out," Lily said, smiling.

"Yes, yes," Marlene waved it away. "I'm not a complete cow." She turned to Lily with a grin. "So, what other ridiculously romantic things does James do without prompting?" she asked. "We might as well get all the jealousy out now. Like purging."

Lily snorted. "Excellent. I'm so glad we make you feel this way."

"Come on," Marlene prodded. "I haven't had a date in _ages_. I need to live vicariously through you."

"Hmmm . . ." Lily said, thinking it over. "He brings home flowers for no reason. I'm fairly sure they're stolen, but," she smiled wickedly, "I definitely don't discourage him from continuing."

"Oh, stolen flowers are the best," Marlene sighed. "Well, I'm assuming their stolen from gardens and whatnot, rather than off a shopkeeper."

Lily laughed. "Oh, that I can confirm. He isn't the best at picking them cleanly. I'm a bit concerned he'll have the authorities called on him, as I can just picture him sneaking around some old woman's yard, making off with all her best blooms."

"Oh, that's an image," Marlene laughed. "Can you picture him trying to explain himself to the police?"

Lily nodded. "It gives me nightmares."

"Where is our darling James tonight?" Marlene asked, glancing around the empty apartment and having another sip of wine.

"Oh, he's out with the lads," Lily replied. "Apparently Peter's been a bit down lately, so they're taking him round for a few pints to try and cheer him up."

"Ah," Marlene said, sipping on her wine and avoiding any further comment.

Lily sighed. "I know you aren't a huge fan of them, but truly, I think you'd change your mind if you gave them a chance."

"Oh, I like the other three well enough," Marlene commented, "but it just seems that Pettigrew doesn't have much to recommend him."

"You mean he's not handsome," Lily scolded.

Marlene threw her a glare. "I'd like to think I'm not _that_ vain, thank you. I'll admit his beady eyes give me the shivers, but I was referring more to his personality."

"And?"

"And it doesn't seem like it's a particularly good one. I'm not saying he's a monster or anything," she went on quickly before Lily could say anything. "I just mean he seems a bit," she shrugged, "like a sheep, you know. Whatever I've thought of the others, you don't have to doubt that they have the courage to simply be who they are. Even when that was a bunch pompous prats. Pettigrew," she gestured with her wine glass, nearly spilling some, "seems content to bask in their limelight. And I find that a hard trait to respect."

Lily sipped her wine thoughtfully. "I can see why you'd feel that way, but I think he's just overshadowed. The others are all very talented and smart, and were always popular. I think he just doesn't have anything to make him stand out. To be honest, I find myself pitying him for it."

"I'm sure he'd appreciate that," Marlene commented with an eyeroll.

"You're right," Lily smiled. "He'd probably be horribly offended by both of our opinions."

"Which is an excellent reason for us to move on," Marlene said. "And, as it happens, by move on, I mean go to sleep. I'm shattered."

Lily laughed. "Of course. Are you sure you won't take the bed? James was planning on staying over at Sirius' tonight."

"Don't be stupid," Marlene waved her away. "I'm not kicking you out of your own bed. The couch will be lovely."

* * *

When James came home in the morning, he found Marlene asleep on the couch. She had managed to twist herself into what looked like a very uncomfortable position, but she seemed to be sleeping soundly, so James left her to it.

He made his way quietly into the bedroom. Sure enough, Lily was sleeping. As always, she had sprawled across it, with her arms and legs outstretched. James grabbed a small card and scrawled a short message on it.

_Because you manage to take up the whole of the bed, whether I'm in it or not._

He examined the little card, decided it would do, and set it gently next to Lily on the bed. He took a quick shower, making a concerted effort not to wake either of the girls, and dressed quietly in the bathroom.

He smiled when he found them both sleeping when he finished. He moved quietly into the kitchen and began cooking. He pulled out eggs and sausages and brewed some tea.

As the smell of cooking breakfast began to permeate the apartment, he heard Marlene stir.

"Oh, you are a bloody catch," she mumbled, making James laugh. "Is any of that for me?"

"As much as you'd like," he said.

Knowing she would want some without needing to ask, he brought her over a cup of tea with milk and sugar.

She took it gratefully. "Aren't you a dear," she said, sipping it slowly.

"I think so, yes," he agreed, nodding sharply and earning a laugh. James glanced at the bedroom with concern. "Listen," he whispered, "I've a favor to ask you."

Marlene raised an eyebrow. "Alright," she said. "I'm surprised it's you asking and not Lily, but I'm sure I'll do whatever I can."

Again he glanced at the bedroom. "That's sort of part of it. It's about Lily, and you have to keep it to yourself."

Marlene eyed him suspiciously. "You're making me nervous now, James. I didn't think you had any secrets from Lily."

"Well," he said, scratching at his ear. "I think she'd rather it be a surprise."

"Oooh," Marlene got on board immediately. "I love surprises. What is it?"

"Well," he whispered. "It's just that I need some help figuring out her ring size. I was going to just nick one of hers and bring it to the jeweler, but she doesn't have any. I mean, what kind of a girl doesn't have a single –"

He was cut off by the high pitched noise that came from Marlene as she decided what it must mean that he want Lily's ring size. Somehow he didn't think Marlene would like to be considered someone who screamed in excitement at moments like these, but James couldn't think of a better term.

Unfortunately, his goal had been secrecy, and the stirring in the bedroom suggested Lily would join them momentarily.

"Listen, not a word," he said. "Please."

Marlene made a gesture of zipping and then locking her lips, which baffled James slightly, but he didn't have time to dwell on it. "Can you meet me at the Jeweler down the south end of High Street tomorrow at 3:00?" he asked in a hiss.

Marlene nodded. "Absolutely. Oh, James, I'm so excited," she said, bouncing and clapping.

"Yes," he said. "I gather that. But we don't want Lily to think anything's up, so you've got to keep it under control."

"Of course," she said, nodding more calmly. "Of course."

When James felt somewhat assured she could keep it together, he went back over to the kitchen to finish breakfast. His timing was spot on, as Lily appeared only moments later and greeted him with a smile and a kiss. She seemed amused by the card he had left her.

* * *

_I'm slightly undecided, but the next chapter should either be picking out the ring with Marlene or the actual proposal (if I decide to scrap the whole picking out the ring bit). If you have a strong opinion one way or the other, feel free to let me know. _

_As always, thanks to those of you who reviewed._

_-Naj  
_


	27. Glimpses  Yeah?

James sat in the pub across from the jewelers, watching for Marlene. He didn't want to go in the shop until she was there. He'd been in often enough to know the jeweler would hover. And he couldn't very well pace in front of the shop without risking someone seeing him and ruining the surprise.

When he saw her approach, he settled his tab and headed over to meet her. He saw her eyeing the rings as he stepped in.

"James," she called, practically bouncing. "Show me what you've been thinking of," she demanded, marching over to him and dragging him further into the shop.

He laughed. "Well," he said. "I had been thinking of this one," he offered, pointing to a three-stone diamond ring.

"Oh," Marlene sighed, holding her hands up to her mouth. "It's beautiful. I'm sure she would love it. Absolutely love it."

James smiled a bit nervously. "Well, I hope that doesn't mean I'm making a mistake for going in a different direction . . ."

"No," she said. "Of course not. What did you decided on instead?" she asked, looking around.

He pulled a ring out of his pocket. "When I was telling my mum about shopping for the ring, she remembered that my grandmother had left me this in her will." He showed her the ring. The silver band twisted delicately around a ruby, with a diamond on each side.

"Oh, Merlin, James," Marlene said. "This is perfect." She smiled up at him, her eyes glimmering. "I can't believe you ever considered another ring if this was an option."

James smiled. "I didn't know it was an option. Apparently my grandmother left explicit instructions that I was only to be given it if my mother approved of my choice of wife."

At Marlene's look, he laughed. "Apparently my grandmother thought no one would ever be able to tame my dad. My mum earned her respect the first time she straightened him out in front of her." He grinned. "My grandmother was not someone you trifled with," he added ruefully. "It still surprises me my dad could have gotten away with anything at all in her house."

"Anyway, it seems she thought I was cut from the same cloth," he continued, "and was very concerned I'd marry a woman who would let me run wild. Hence the stipulation in her will about only giving me the ring if I chose someone she would have approved of."

"And I can't see anyone disapproving of Lily," Marlene agreed.

"Certainly not my mum, who tried her best to keep me in line for years and never managed half so well as Lily did even _before_ we were dating," he commented.

"Right," Marlene said, glancing around. "I'm very happy about this and all, but I'm a bit confused as to what I'm doing here if you've already chosen a ring."

James smiled. "Well . . ." James said, handing the ring to Marlene. "The thing is, my grandmother was actually a fairly big woman. Not fat, mind you. But big. Tall, big bones, huge fingers."

Marlene laughed as she slid the ring on her thumb with plenty of space to spare. "You aren't kidding."

James shook his head. "Not in the least. So, I need to have it sized, and I figured you could help me there."

"I sure can," Marlene grinned cheerfully. "I brought a ring of mine Lily has borrowed a number of times. And I might have seen her slide it on to her ring finger a time or two recently," she added conspiratorially. "Apparently you aren't the only one who's been pondering marriage."

James felt something in his shoulders relax. "Yeah?" he said, trying to keep the nerves out of his voice.

Marlene leaned up to kiss him on the cheek. "You'll be fine. She loves you. How can she not when you leave her sappy little love notes for no reason?" She laughed when his face turned scarlet.

"She told you about that?" he asked.

"Darling," Marlene said, patting him and using her best patronizing tone, "you do leave them about the place. And there are occasionally other people, say, pouring a glass of wine."

James cleared his throat. "You make a fair point," he admitted.

"Don't I just," she agreed. "Now, let's speak to the man about getting your lovely ring sized."

* * *

_ So, I read all my stories over the long weekend, which was kind of interesting. I had actually forgotten the vast majority of what I'd written, so it was like reading some new fanfics that just happened to exactly suit my preferences and sense of humor. I guess there are some upsides to having the memory of a fruit fly. Anyway, it made me want to finish this one up, since it wasn't left at a very good stopping point. This chapter's a bit crap, but it should get us all from Point A to Point C. Maybe someday I'll reread it and improve, but for now I hope it'll do. _

_ On a related note, in the course of my rereading, I noticed a rather unfortunate mistake in one of my stories (I've already forgotten which one). Mostly I decided to just ignore any typos, since all the uploads have expired and it seemed like a lot of work to redo all that business. But in this particular case, I thought it warranted the effort. So, if anyone happened to notice the part where I said someone sat down next to "a black," I actually meant to write black boy, which is, you know, considerably less racist. *Shakes head* __**Such**__ an awkward typo. Apologies. _


	28. Merry

_Christmas Day_

_

* * *

_

Lily leaned against the door as James unlocked their apartment.

"Your mother really is very sweet," she said.

James smiled at her. "You only think that because she loves you. Trust me, she's got her fair share of teeth."

"Mmmhhmmm . . ." Lily said, pushing off the wall to walk into their front room. "Should I tell her you said that?" she teased.

"Absolutely not," James returned, shaking his head and backing her toward the Christmas tree. "Not if you want to ever see me again, anyway."

Lily laughed. "Well, at least I know how to get rid of you if the need should ever arise."

"Which it won't," he said, kissing her lightly.

"No?" she asked in her best innocent voice. "You're awfully sure of yourself."

"Very," he admitted with a nod. "See, I figure I have to be pretty fantastic."

"Oh?" she said, raising an eyebrow. "What in the world makes you think that?"

"Well," he whispered. "I don't know if you know, but I have this beautiful girlfriend. I mean stunning. And she's not just looks. She's brilliant, smart, funny, sweet. Really perfect in every way. And I don't figure you get a girl like that if you don't have anything to offer in return."

Lily scrunched up her nose. "Maybe she just feels sorry for you, because you're so obviously delusional."

James laughed. "No, no. Rose isn't like that at all." He caught her hand when she hit him. "Lily. I'm sorry. I meant Lily. Anyone could make that mistake."

"Well anyone who doesn't want to sleep on the sofa tonight had better not," Lily threatened.

"You're right," he said. "I'd better find a way to make it up to you."

"Mmmhhmmm . . ." she shook her head. "And you've already exhausted your store of presents," she said. "You might be out of luck."

James grinned. "Well, as it happens," he said, "I do have one more."

Lily eyed him suspiciously. "Do you?" she asked.

"Yup," he responded cheerfully, pulling a little gift box off their Christmas tree.

"Darling, I don't think ornaments count as presents," Lily said. "Lucky for you I love you anyway," she added, leaning in to kiss him. "And I'm very forgiving."

"Oh, well," he said. "In that case, I'll have to find someone else to give this to," he said. "And it already had your name on the card and everything."

She might have discounted his claims, but she happened to see that her name really was scrawled across a tiny little card. She immediately snatched it from his hands and opened it.

* * *

_Because I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I want to spend the rest of my life with you._

_

* * *

_

She smiled, knowing he would tease her for tearing up over something so small. She leaned her forehead against his and brushed noses with him. "Me too," she said.

"I'm glad," he whispered, and she was surprised to realize his voice sounded hoarse. "But you haven't even opened your present yet," he added quietly.

She glanced down at the box he handed her. "Really?" she asked.

He nodded, but didn't speak. When she took the box, she noticed his hands were sweating. Carefully, she unwrapped the outside to find that it contained a little jewelry box. When she looked up to thank him, her breath caught.

"James," she said, when she saw him on one knee.

Gently, he took the box from her hands and pulled out the ring. "Will you marry me?" he asked, offering it to her.

She tried to speak, but couldn't make her voice work. Nodding, and giving in to tears, she slipped down to her knees and allowed him to slide the ring onto her finger.

* * *

_ I almost never got around to this point, because I couldn't decide how I wanted him to propose. It was a choice between this and one other option, which I may have to someday make use of. At any rate, I hope you enjoyed. I think this is actually the end of the story. I know I've said that before, and it's not out of the question that I will one day have some sort of divine inspiration for a later scene, but I don't have any ideas left in my head on this one and I'm at too good a stopping point to force myself to come up with any. _

_ Thank you all for reading and reviewing. And – as always – I'd love any feedback you might have. _


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